Post # 1
A month and half has passed since the wedding. DH and I have settled into married life perfectly and finally got our professional pictures back (check out our recap http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/ice-storm-or-not-we-had-an-elegant-country-spring-wedding-413-pics#axzz2U4pXHmgA). Now to update all of you about what has happened since the vandalism happened to our home. If you missed the first post here it is http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/family-encouraged-cruel-wedding-pranks#axzz2U4pXHmgA
The cops talked to everybody. No charges were pressed. They were told they had better apologize, what they did was completely unacceptable, and if they weren’t able to come to an agreement with us about how to handle the damages there WOULD be charges pressed. The damages have been paid for between the three of them. Our living room floors will be getting refinished this summer. We were able to get the laser jet ink cartridges fixed to work again. I know many people said that they wouldn’t have called the cops but honestly, if we let his family walk all over us now how will it be in the future? Will they come and let all of our animals out and consider it a “prank” or tamper with my vehicle as a “prank?” Since DH’s brother was the instigator of the entire thing and we knew his parents wouldn’t discipline him, we sure as hell weren’t afraid to.
One of the cousins deleted and blocked me from Facebook and the other just doesn’t talk to me anymore. DH’s family wouldn’t talk to us for over two weeks. They invited us out to supper with one of the grandparents and we both felt guilty about not going because Grandma is getting old. Talk about an awkward meal! The brother wouldn’t even LOOK at DH and I. The in-laws were overly cordial to us and saying how much they missed us. You could tell it was a big show. But since it was a non-threatening environment of course they would be polite. Also, I’m not sure if Grandma had heard about what had all taken place.
I did manage to show my MIL the pictures of our home. I caught her at the perfect time. She was going on and on about how her house was just a mess and she couldn’t keep up with it and I grasped the opportunity to whip out my phone and said, “Well at least you didn’t come home from your wedding to find your home looking like THIS!” She was speechless (she’s kind of a ditz so the fact she was lost for words wasn’t too surprising) but it looked like someone had slapped her. I don’t think she realized how bad it really was. All she could say was “wow” and she quickly changed the subject.
DH’s brother still will not speak to either of us (not that I want to speak to that aspiring felon anyway) but it does make thinks awkward at times. Mother’s Day for example; he wouldn’t even eat with DH’s parents and Grandma. He kept pouting and stomping around the house (the in-laws home) like a little brat. DH tried to be the bigger man and said “Hey X” and he just walked right past him with no acknowledgement given. Douche canoe.
Since the wedding we have changed the locks, started locking our home at all times, and have definitely distanced ourselves from the in-laws. Unless it involves visiting the grandparents we don’t associate with them anymore. I know it bothers DH that he doesn’t talk to his father anymore but DH says our happiness of our home life comes first. I don’t know how I could have possibly dealt with all of this without his support. I’m glad he had the balls to stand up for US because if you couldn’t tell, his family is a bunch of bullies. So life has gone on but I’m still disgusted with the whole situation. I really appreciate all of your support throughout this whole situation it means a lot! I just pray that nobody else EVER has to deal with a crappy situation like this!
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
Oh wow, thanks for posting an update. Glad you guys stood up for yourselves!! And I’m glad at least your MIL had the chance to realize that what your cousins did was WAY out of bounds.
Post # 4
I’m glad you stood up against your (shitty) in laws. It sucks that they somehow think you are the bag guy for calling the cops, but it’s great that your husband stood up for your home and marriage.
Hopefully this “prank” soaked up any potential bad karma you might have had so that you have a joyful marriage.
Post # 5
@Cummins59: I’ve never, in all my life, heard of such a thing. I’m so sorry this happened to you! I think you guys did the right thing. How damaging to your husband’s relationship with his brother, too. Just awful.
Post # 6
Ugh! I am so glad you stood up for yourselves! I’m also glad that MIL got to actually see how bad it was!
Post # 7
I’m glad y’all resolved this…I honestly would have done the same thing.
I saw your recap awhile ago too, you’re wedding was so beautiful!!
Post # 8
@Cummins59: thanks for the update, I’ve been waiting for one. I’m so glad our Husband stand up for you and your relationship, his family sound just awful. I’d wait for his brother to get married and then return the favour, but I’m a bitch like that ;).
Post # 9
You are more kind than I am because I would have pressed charges. It’s good you called the cops and got it on file. I hope you took photos of everything!
Post # 10
Thanks for the update, as many other bees I’ve been wondering what happened. I hope things goes smoother with time and that your husbands brother will one day grow up and manage to produce an excuse. However, until that time – I think you’ve done everything right in this awful situation.
You had a rough start, but I think you’ve proven to the world that you’re indeed a team!
Post # 11
What a classy bunch. Sounds like your DH is a diamond in the rough!
Post # 12
Good for you for calling the cops; sounds like certain members of his family needed a serious wake up call. They won’t mess around with you again, which I’m sure is a huge relief for you!! I’m glad they are covering the damages too (damn straight!!).
Post # 13
i was just thinking about this the other day and wondering how things were going. i’m glad your DH stood up for you and your relationship. those people are insane and don’t deserve to be a part of your lives. i absolutely think calling the cops was the right thing to do. i would’ve done the same thing! i’m also glad the damages are being paid for by the people who should be paying it!
Post # 14
Glad you settled and hope they pay up. Glad your FI stepped up to them as well. And wow they are treating you like you did somehting to them. Wow. I’d be so embarrased if I was them and begging for forgiveness, not acting offended. it sucks that he is kinda loosing his fam, but you don’t need these people in your lives. All the best.
Post # 15
Great update! You know, you could visit the grandparents without the rest of DH’s family. My advice is to keep up all precautions, heck I would invest in a wireless security system (check out amazon.com) – that way you could check in on your home and animals even when away from home. Based on the guilty party’s reactions and behavior, I wouldn’t trust them EVER.
Post # 16
@Cummins59: Wow. I can’t believe they STILL don’t understand how absolutely horrendous and disgusting their actions were. I feel sad for your DH about essentially losing his family, but they brought that upon themselves. He definitely sound like the best of the bunch by far.