Post # 1
My mom brought up a good point this morning and I thought I would solicit some advice…
My family is a little odd. My dad was married for a long time before he married my mom and had my brother and me. My dad had three kids in his first marriage — my half sister and two half brothers. My sister is 20 years older than I am and we really haven’t been super close to my hald siblings since they were adults and getting married and having kids when my brother and I were only a few years old.
I really like my half siblings. my Fiance and I didn’t want a huge wedding party, so we invited his best friend and my birth brother to stand on his side. I planned to ask my half brothers to be my ushers and my half sister to be a part of the ceremony as a reader or something similar.
My mom mentioned how that would mean that my brothers would be in the wedding party pictures as ushers, but my sister would not be since she would be a reader. She thinks this would make my sister sad, and I agree…
What do I do? My Fiance and I don’t want to add to our wedding party just to keep others happy, but I also don’t want my sister to feel excluded in any way. Do I have friends usher so no one is in the wedding or does that just hurt everyone?? I mentioned having all three of them be ushers (and my sister, an usherette)… and that was sort of laughed at…
What do you suggest?
Post # 3
What about having all three siblings read? I saw at a wedding recently where three people read the same passage. On read the beginning, then the second took over, and the third finished. It was three of the bride’s favorite aunts, but I could see it working with siblings, too. It was really quite touching.
Another option would be asking sis to be your personal attendant in addition to a reader. Kinda double the honor/responsibility, but it still wouldn’t add any people to your actual wedding party.
Post # 4
Also, YOU get to decide who you want in photos. Include her if you want to!
Post # 5
Yeah I agree with babylou. *YOU* get to decide who’s in the pictures so if you want her/them in the wedding party pics, then do so! There are NO rules that say you can’t do that.
Post # 6
I think what was meant by that is my brothers would be in similar attire as the wedding party, but I see your point. 😀
I really like the idea of the three of them reading! I want to talk to Fiance and see if he is okay with adding to the wedding party.
It isn’t that I DON’T want my siblings, it’s that my Fiance already isn’t going to have a ton of family, if any, that will be AT the wedding. I want something to feel like HIS family, not that everything has to be MY family.
It feels like this wedding is all about me and my family, and there has been so little to do with his family — but they really don’t have more than a handful of people they still talk to… So I guess there is no way around that.