- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
I am wanting other brides opinions on a family issue.. First I will give you the background story:
When I was about 3 or 4 years old my mom and dad got a divorce. My sisters and I would take turns staying over at moms/dads every other weekend, but our mom had full custody of us. By the time I hit the 3rd grade, my dad dropped me and my older sister off and said, “I’ll see you in 2 weeks!” Six years go by and I’m a freshman in high school and still have not seen/heard from my dad. By this point I thought he was dead. My mom had gotten remarried and had been with my stepdad for 10 years so we thought it would be better for us to change our last name to our stepdad’s. He was more of a father to us and was always there when we needed something. We fill out all the paper work, post it in the newspaper and our lawyer notified our biological father with a letter stating what we were doing. Now mind you we haven’t heard from him in SIX years! Our lawyer said she dropped off the letter at the residence he had listed, but no one was there. She didn’t think there was going to be an issue on the day we show up to court. Well what do you know.. He shows up to tell the judge he doesn’t want us to change our name. He lost that battle, but afterwards we said we would like to see him more often. He agreed and said he would call us. Eight years have now passed and I have heard from him mayyybe 5 times total, but he has never followed through with wanting to meet up.
2 years ago I found my aunt on Facebook and decided to add her, and I decided to meet up with her and her family since I haven’t ever met them. Her and I have hit it off and became close as well as my dad’s other sister and their family. But while we were going through 12 years of not talking to my dad my grandma and aunts wanted nothing to do with us. We tried calling them and setting up times for us to meet, but they would flake (mostly my grandma).
Here is where I am getting at… Now that I’m getting married and I have relationship with both of my aunts (my father’s sisters) I am inviting them to the wedding, BUT I do not care to invite my grandma. Since I have reconnected with my aunts I have seen my grandma twice. She writes on my Facebook, but I don’t consider that worthy enough to spend money for you to come to my wedding.
Has anyone else gone through something similar? What did you do? I haven’t told my aunts that I’m not sending my grandma an invitation.. I’m just sending them out and ignoring it. :S