(Closed) Family Members Asking for Money Toward Gifts….HELP!

posted 4 years ago in Holidays
Post # 3
8471 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@MrsD41503:  We just make our own gifts for people (cookies, custom ornaments, jewelry, etc).  If others want to chip in on a gift, that’s fine, but I’d rather not complicate the holidays further by mixing family/friends and finances.

Post # 5
2972 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

Wow how uncomfortable. I would just tell them you have a seperate gift planned, and say something like “please do not feel pressured to add our names to the card, as it makes us uncomfortable.”  I dunno, be firm but be as diplomatic as possible.

Post # 6
8471 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@MrsD41503:  I just explain that we’ve already gotten (insert name) a gift, so we won’t be able to contribute.  We have to do this with my BIL all the time.

Post # 7
12259 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Holy moly! I’d just politely decline and say you’re being extra budget concious this year!

Or throw out a number that you can contribute and put the ball in their court!

Post # 8
3596 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@MrsD41503:  oh sweetie, I am sorry that you have to negotiate this with your family.

But it sounds as though you are on the right path. Stick to you ideals. Set your gifitng policy now and after a while, they won’t bother you with this stuff.

You don’t want to hear my rant about the stupid, useless, and boring gifting frenzy that is Xmas. ugh. I got out of it decades ago.


Post # 9
2810 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

“we have already purchased our holiday gifts for this year, so we won’t be contributing”

simple as that. if they get pissed off, that’s their problem.

Post # 10
2213 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@housebee:  +1

Just say you’ve already bought them something.  Even if it’s not quite true, the intention is there and that’s good enough. 

If they’re really pushy, I could see them possibly pressuring you to contribute still if they think you don’t already have the gift in hand.  Sort of “well, if you haven’t already spent the money, we could use it toward the group gift…”

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