(Closed) Family photos without the bride and groom?!?

posted 11 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
Member
900 posts
Busy bee

Doing a large family photo not tacky!  I am not a fan of the “it’s your day” catch-all phrase, but this is one of the times when I think it totally applies.  If you want a large family photo during the reception, then you should have one!  Why not!?

As for the other family photos, I would talk to your dad.   Tell him that you are so appreciative that he is paying for the photographer but you are worried that it is a waste of money to hire a photographer to shoot the wedding if he is going to miss a large chunk of the wedding doing other photographs.  If he is adamant about it, I think you have to let it go since he is footing the bill.  Maybe tell him you are going to hire a second photographer just to make sure no one misses anything (see if he gets the hint)?  But yes – I think it would be kinda strange to do those photos at your wedding.

Post # 4
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I think that one large family photo is OK and fairly common.  But I would let your dad know that the photographers job at the wedding is to shoot the wedding, not take 2 hours out to do family photos, especially w/out the bride and groom in them.  However, if you dad is paying for the photographer, that really does give him a lot of leeway.  Perhaps you could compromise, and have him pay for an extra hour or two for the photog to take the family pics BEFORE the wedding photos? 

Post # 5
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Yep…I have to agree….that does seem strange. If everyone is going to be there already couldn’t he hire the photographer for the day BEFORE the wedding as well? Maybe you all can do family photos at the Rehearsal Dinner as opposed to at the actual wedding. That way you can take advantage of fact that all of the family is in one place for photos…and still have the shots you want at your reception.

Post # 6
Member
1900 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Could you possibly do these photos at another time during your weekend? Like in between the rehearsal and RD? I think any good photographer would address this upfront and say that it is not a good idea to try to do all those other photos during your wedding.

Post # 8
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Not at your wedding! Weddings are for celebrating the wedding and marriage of the couple… can you schedule it for some other time that weekend?

Post # 9
Member
1900 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Most photographers I’ve seen offer packages where they include a “Day-After” shoot or you can get them to shoot the Rehearsal Dinner. It’s fairly common now to have more than one “session” associated with a wedding. I really don’t think it would be that much more and don’t be afraid to ask. You really don’t want the photographer trying to take all these family portraits on your day and they probably don’t want to do it becuse it will distract them from their main job.

I’d also love to here a photog’s take on this.

Post # 10
Member
3124 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

ouch – good question.  If it’s just snap snap snap, a few pics, that’s fine, but there is no reason you need a 2 hour photoshoot in the middle of the wedding for this.  You have to find some compromise – a second shooter, day after shoot, something – the wedding day thing is just too much.  I would just hire my own photographer that day if getting that kind of issue from my parents.  They’ll regret spending 2 hours rearranging themselves while the rest of the group is celebrating and having a fun day.

Post # 11
Member
39 posts
Newbee

hahhhahahah!  Talk to your photographer. Melissa from agirlinlove in Michigan is hands down the coolest photog out there. My family bombarded her (really me to translate to her) that they wanted family portraits!!!!  She handled it with such grace and laughter. It took a few minutes and the photos are gorgeous and my family (aunts, lots of cousins) is grateful. It was an easy group shot – granted the group kept growing so she kept clicking away.

Feel out your photographer. Also, see if a “portrait booth” is available. This may be fun for all your guests!

Post # 12
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Most photographers have assistants who will be able to do something like this, that is catch the wedding while the family shoot is giong on.  

Post # 12
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Most photographers have assistants who will be able to do something like this, that is catch the wedding while the family shoot is giong on.  

Post # 13
Member
171 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

I’m a photographer, and my take on this is that it detracts from the bride and groom’s day.

I am fine with a quick shot in front of the church, etc, but I really prefer all photos to feature the bride/groom/ or both.

I would do one large family shot with no problem, but I can’t do “two jobs for the price of one.” The wedding day is simply too hectic. The assistant is also there to benefit the wedding day, not do a family portrait session.

Don’t forget that we do this for a living, and when people try to combine jobs into one, it does hurt our bottom line and increases costs for everyone.

It isn’t included in the scope of the package. I simply don’t have time to do these types of portraits on the wedding day due to time, and your dad would be compromising your wedding coverage.

My client is the bride and groom no matter who pays, so I can only do what the bride wants. Check your contract to see who is actually the client and can make these decisions.

Your dad wants 10 separate portraits. That will take at least an hour to make them nice. They should be done the day before or day after.

Post # 14
Member
4801 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

This is tricky because your dad is paying for the photographer, so technically he does have the right to ask for this. But I do think you need to have a conversation with him, basically saying that it will take a long time to shoot all those pictures, and that they can be shot anytime, but your wedding is a once in a lifetime event, and you’re disappointed at the idea of your photographer missing pictures of that for the other shots which could be taken at another time.

Maybe as your thank you gift to him you could pay the photographer to come out the day before or after, or for second photographer, to do these pictures?

 

But yeah, in either case it kinda irks me to do big portraits at a wedding that don’t include the bride and groom. At my shower Future Mother-In-Law was taking a bunch of family pictures…all the cousins, all the girls, etc. I was not included in any, and it really hurt my feelings.

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