(Closed) family vent … i hate doing this but i need to let it out before i explode :(

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I read through your post – the best thing you can do is not get involved.

It is clear that while she is your FI’s mother – she is not being a mother at all. She seems to be doing everything in her power to lose contact with her children, and be extremely unsupportive and petty.

I say let her carry on, you and Fiance have his brother who have already been outshunned by her, and they are leading happy lives and doing better as a family without her.

Your Future Sister-In-Law will realise that siding with her mother at the expense of losing contact with all her brothers is silly, and it is up to her to keep in contact with you all (which I am sure she will continue)

I just find it a shame that this woman will end up on her own, and none of her children can be blamed for that. And neither should you or Fiance blame yourselves. I would move on, but keep that door open if she wants to be part of your lives again, but do not let her control your lives and make it miserable.

Post # 6
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@stokieGal:

Regardless if your Future Mother-In-Law wanted a girl – she should unconditionally love all her children. That just sounds really heartless.. and I would question her mental wellbeing as it sounds like these problems have only occured since all the brothers have grown up so to speak? Maybe she just can’t accept that her children just don’t need her anymore, so she is cutting them off now so she doesn’t have to feel loneliness later?

If she presses for a reason why your not visiting, be blunt and tell her the truth. Maybe even give her the whole truth that ALL of her sons feel that way. And guarenteed this resentment will extend to her daughter, regardless of how much better she is treated, as she is cutting off her family ties with her brothers.

Post # 8
Member
1542 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

OMG just OMG.. this woman’s awfull, not that you need me to tell you this.

As bad as it sounds it’s just a matter of time before she bans everyone from her life.

Try to stay out of it, this famili has a deep rotted problem and you’ll only get into an awfull lot of trouble if you step in the middle of it. Stay strong next to your Fiance, support him when times are hard and advice him when he’s wrong, but don’t get in the middle of the storm.

Good luck.

Post # 9
Member
341 posts
Helper bee

Wow… I hardly know what to say to that altho I do agree with PPs to stay out of it as much as possible, you don’t need to give this warlock ammunition to ban you, too. Besides that, my first thought was to uninvite her and then invite all the brothers that are banned but then your Fiance would be banned along with them but that’s not be a good way to start a marriage. I would just do my best to ignore her and her comments and encourage Fiance to turn to your mom when he needs one. My FI’s parents are like second parents to me, mine weren’t always the greatest and only in the last few years have we been getting along so I really appreciate having in-laws I can talk to and I’m sure your Fiance would too.

The topic ‘family vent … i hate doing this but i need to let it out before i explode :(’ is closed to new replies.

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