Post # 1
(Disclaimer: My family is notorious for giving horrid gifts, and now I have to write Thank You notes telling them how great they are. I know I can’t be alone, and the fantasy notes have the potential to be funny. Please keep comments about me being ungrateful to yourself.)
Thank you so much for the shower gifts you gave me. The blue and green potholder will look great in my red and yellow kitchen. I especially enjoyed the poem you wrote in the card accompanying the tiny frying pan and IHOP gift card that stated I’ll probably burn anything I try to cook, so I may as well go to IHOP. I guess you forgot that I went to culinary school and have worked as a chef. Since the nearest IHOP is over 100 miles from here, it will give J and I the opportunity to do a little traveling to use it.
I must say, this gift is overall much better than the giant box of Hooter’s t-shirts you gave me at Christmas.
Thanks again! We look forward to seeing you at the wedding!
Oh man that feels better. Let it out, ladies.
Post # 3
Thank you for the wedding gift. The choice of a women’s petite blouse is an unusual wedding gift, but it’s clear that you put great thought into it by selecting a size meant for a woman at least five inches shorter than me. Writing your name on both front and back of the price tag was, well, priceless, especially since that means I cannot exchange it. My husband is also enjoying the blouse. He had a great time laughing at me when I put it on! All in all we both just loved it.
Post # 4
Heeeeeeeeeeee!!!! Too funny! Sometimes we just have to laugh at the situation… and your situation sounds pretty funny! 🙂 🙂 🙂
Post # 5
(thankfully, we did not receive such a gift, but one of my husband’s relatives did at their wedding)
Thank you for the wedding gift. I can’t imagine setting up house without an engraved toilet seat. We will think of you every time we use it, and it’s sure to cheer us up when we’re down in the dumps. We can’t wait for you to visit so you can enjoy it as much as we do.
Mr and Mrs ____
Post # 6
WOW! well I have to say that if this person intentionally gives you these hilarious gifts to be funny, then the Thank You note was perfect! It seems that they are a bunch of pranksters and if that is the case then good for you! It becomes annoying when people wast their money and your gift on jokes. It reminds me of those people who are invited to surprise 30 or 40 year old bday party’s and bring gag gifts, why? It is dumb to waste your money on something that someone cannot use! Although, if they were trying to be sincere (which it doesn’t sound like it) I would try to lower the sarcasm.
Post # 7
OMG I just woke up my soundly sleeping cat from laughing so hard!!!!
Thank you soooo much for the faux leather purse. I have seen it at Marshall’s but gosh, the $9.99 price tag was a bit out of my budget. I didn’t know they made purses in such an interesting shade of red…which of course you know is normally my favorite color. I can’t wait to use it next week at your party, it will be quite stunning with the pink shirt I picked out to wear when we were shopping together last week. I’ve never had a clutch before, so hopefully you’ll be close by to hold onto it for me when I am having a drink/smoking a cigarette/petting the dog. Well, gotta go, as now I have to find a pair of pants with some big ol’ pockets to hold my wallet & cell phone because once I put my keys in the purse it will be pretty full.
Your favorite niece
Post # 8
Dear FI’s Aunt and Uncle,
Thank you ever so much for the pink and orange pieces of China. They are mismatched, which is exactly look I am going for in my home! The tiny little platters will come in handy when I am serving tiny little food to my tiny little friends. But I think the most special part of the gift is that it has a musty smell, which means you must have purchased from my favorite store, the Salvation Army. I will treasure this gift always, and will alway think of you (and the dead person that owned it before me) when I use it.
Post # 9
Hilarious! You girls are too funny.
Post # 10
I am belly laughing at my desk right now!!!
Post # 11
Goodness this is a GREAT thread! It stinks that you had to put the disclaimer about it all being a joke though. 🙁
Haven’t received any gifts yet, but I definitely needed the laugh this morning. 🙂
Post # 12
THIS IS FOR MY MOMMA!
No kidding, her Future Mother-In-Law (my grandmother) gave my mom and dad two planters in the shape of outhouses with their names written on them with sharpie. Here’s how her note would go:
Thanks so much for the planters, now every time I water my plants I will thank my lucky stars that your son was able to pick himself up by his bootstraps and make something of his life so that we can have a real live inside bathroom. And thank you so much for taking the time to personalize our outhouses. It gives them a little extra special piece of elegance and really shows the time and effor that you put into your son’s wedding gift. We are proudly displaying the planters in the darkest corner of the basement storage closet…when you use an outhouse, you need a little privacy, right?
Post # 13
Dear Future Mother-In-Law,
Thank you so much for the lovely and very colorful salt and pepper shakers. I have to say I never thought you could have the colors red, green, purple and yellow all stuck on one small shaker. They will go great with my blue and white kitchen and I’m glad they were so affordable for you! After all getting them for free from your youngest child’s school auction is a real bargain! I’ll have to go next year and check out the junk table with you!
Also thank you for the grey socks with the little lady bugs all over them, they are only 4 sizes to small I’m sure I can make it work!
Post # 14
This is the funniest Weddingbee thread I’ve seen so far.
Too bad I’ve never gotten gifts I consider bad
Post # 15
This is in honor of one of my friends. 🙂
Dear Close Relative,
Thank you so much for the oversized, ceramic serving platter. The attachments you included are so darling. You even labeled them for me so I would know what to do with them. The plastic pineapple attachment is perfect for everyday use, just like you wrote. Also, I can’t wait to pull out the giant, rubber sprig of holly that you included for "holiday festivities." My favorite aspect of the gift is that it is so large that it cannot be contained in any of my cabinets. I love having it propped up in the corner of my studio apartment! Thanks again!
Post # 16
On behalf of my cousin (this is NOT a joke)
Dear Aunt X and Uncle Y:
Thank you very much for the very thoughtful self-stimulator. After all of your years of being together, you must know what is truly useful in a marriage. It was particularly special to open up such an eye-popping gift in front of all of the elderly women at my shower and to answer their questions about what the gift was for!
Thanks again, every time I use it, I will think of…..well, not you…but thanks anyways!