(Closed) Father-daughter/mother-son dance

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
8342 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

To be perfectly honest, I’d pick a really short song and suck it up for the 3 minutes. It’s a really important part of a wedding for some parents and not worth a huge fight over, IMO.

Post # 4
Member
1778 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We did a combined dance, so I danced with my dad while he danced with his mom.  I ended up inviting my mom onto the floor too and then we invited his dad lol.  In the end it was a family of dancers and it was a lot of fun and a really memorable moment. We danced to “You’ll be in My Heart” from Tarzan. 

If you really do not want an “official” dance, just instruct the DJ what to play as a 1st or 2nd song and have him grab his mom and you grba your dad and dance with them respectively while the other guests dance as well. 

But I would say, for the sake of your relationship with your Future Mother-In-Law, I would just do the dances or 1 combined dance and fade the music out after 2 minutes.  It’s going to worth the 2 minutes for the good karma you will get from here, since she’ll be your Mother-In-Law for a good long time lol!

Post # 5
Member
857 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@pittsteelergirl:  I’m in a similar situation. Fiance and I are having a super casual reception (food truck, no “announcements”, no bouquet toss or anything like that). However, Future Mother-In-Law insists on having a dance with Fiance, and it being a big deal. My father isnt a dancing type – at all – so there will be no father/daughter dance. I’m frustrated about this because the only special thing that Fiance and I are doing is our first dance, with no announcements, so WHY SHOULD HIS MOTHER GET THE SAME? And, what would I do during the dance? Stand there like a dork at my own wedding?

I am with you, mama. Hold your ground. My suggestion, which is what im suggesting for my own wedding, is we will have the DJ play a “special” song and they can dance to it, on their own, but with no announcement or spotlight. Would this work for you as well? 

Post # 6
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee

If it is important to the parents, you should keep them in.  Do them both at the same time, because most guests would rather get all of the traditional stuff out of the way faster.  

Post # 7
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

What does your Fiance think? Has he always wanted a mother/ son dance?
In the end its his (and your) decision… not FMIL’s…..

Post # 8
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m not even a fan of the first dance, let alone the father/daughter and mother/son dances.

Post # 10
Member
857 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@pittsteelergirl:  You are mirroring my feelings exactly. Tell Fiance you’ll play a song for them to dance to, but you’ll not make announcements about it – if he wants to do it at all. It may be his final call to make, but if he wants to give in, i’d make it as informal as possible.  I would, almost, think to not tell Future Mother-In-Law this is the way it’s going to go down, if at all. 

Post # 11
Member
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@pittsteelergirl:  If Fiance doesn’t want to do the dance then he needs to tell her! He just simply informs her that he and you are doing the first dance and there will be no other formal dances, no wedding party dances, no father/daughter dance, nothing but you and him. This is his fight, not yours and he needs to be the one to tell her. Maybe once she knows that there are no other ‘special dances’ she will back off. Maybe let her pick a special song and some point throughout the night, when it starts, she can find Fiance and they can have that dance together, but the spotlight won’t be on them and only them. Others will still be on the dancefloor

Post # 13
Member
857 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@pittsteelergirl:  Ugh, really? I bet she wants to wear a white dress and be there in your bed your wedding night, too? 

Post # 15
Member
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@pittsteelergirl:  maybe for her parent gift you can give her a pair of scissors and some alcohol swabs…sounds like its time to cut the umbilical cord 🙂

Post # 16
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@pittsteelergirl:  

ugh, we’re not doing it. We are only doing bride – groom dance. I think it’s hokey.

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