Post # 1
I am new to the site and am looking for some advice and words of wisdom!
My dad and mom are divorced and my dad and I have had a rocky relationship. My dad is an alcoholic. He’s been struggling with drinking for years. He is by no means sober, but he doesn ‘t drink as much anymore. I will always love him, but with my wedding coming up, I did not want to deal with the stress of having him at the wedding and worrying if he would be drinking. He also has severe anxiety and tends to back out of events and trips at the last minute with some ridiculous excuse.
I thought having a seperate, small ceremony for him would be perfect- and he just called and said no, he wants to walk me down the aisle and does not want a small ceremony. He is sober now, but has relapsed very recently and I worry about him drinking, about him and my mom being in the same room together, about him not knowing anyone etc…
What do I do??
Post # 3
Have you thought having an alcohol free wedding?
A friend was dealing with the same issues so she had an early afternoon wedding with punch, light refreshments etc.
She had a backup plan for a brother to walk her down the aisle in case her Dad had been drinking earlier in the day, but it turned out not to be needed.
Post # 4
@julies1949: You were reading my mind! lol I think that’s a wonderful idea and honestly should ease her stress a bit about what her father may or may not do.
OP as far as your parents being in the same location, that isn’t something that can be helped really. I am a product of a divorced family and I know how difficult that kind of gathering can be. However, it’s your day and they should be willing and able to push their feelings for each other aside and get along.
I think it will all work out just fine! Just try to place some ground rules and a non alcohol plan in place!! Good luck!! And welcome to the Boards!
Post # 5
I think the only way to handle this is to have a dry wedding. Theres no logical way to offer alcohol to your guests but ban your father from drinking. Unless of course you sit down with him and specifically ask him not too drink, but that probably wouldnt go over well with most alcoholics. Good luck with whatever you decide. =)