Post # 1
My dad is coming to the wedding, but he was not really a part of my life growing up. I was reunited with him around 4-5 years ago, and discovered he’s not a bad person at all (except for the whole never contacting us part).
My grandparents and my mother raised me. My grandpa and mother will be the ones walking me down the aisle. But do I also give the father/daughter dance to my grandfather? I would prefer him to do the dance, honestly.
But is it ok to hurt my real dad’s feelings since he’s proven himself to be a normal person, just human? I’m feeling really bad about it.
This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by belleindigo.
Post # 2
- Wedding: October 2015 - Haddonfield, NJ
I am doing my father-daughter dance with my grandfather, but that is due to my father passing away a couple of years ago. If he were around, I’m not entirely sure I would have done it with him. I grew up in very similar circumstances. I say, as long as you don’t call it the “father-daughter dance” it should be okay.
I mean, missing out on most of your life isn’t really just a “human mistake”. You already said that’s what you want to do, and your relationship with your grandfather is clearly a cherished one. I would dance with your grandfather – he earned the spot. You can dance with your dad at other times in the night.
Post # 3
belleindigo: I think your dad will have to understand that your grandfather was there for you when he wasn’t. It sounds like that was his choice, so he’ll have to deal with that fact.
However, if you’re really torn, why not split the dance? Dance the first part with one, then have him hand you off to the other to finish the dance.
Post # 4
2 dances,(maybe pick shorter songs).
Post # 5
I’m not even doing the father/daughter dance, but I suggest you do your dance with your grandfather. It seems like your grandfather is closer to you and that you have more memories with him. If you dad wanted the father/daughter dance than he should have contacted you a long time ago.