(Closed) Father's Day vs Sister's Birthday

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
6998 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

Thats a tough one! I know that there were at least 3 birthdays that fell on the weekend of our wedding. 2 Cousins and my SIL – I actually had little gifts for them and brought them on the dance floor and had everyone sing happy birthday to them. It was the very least i could do and of course the wedding isn’t all about me! its about 2 families coming together and it only felt right to pay tribute to those birthday’s that my wedding may be overshadowing. Maybe that is something you could do for your sister?

Post # 4
1736 posts
Bumble bee

This is a pretty tough decision for you, especially with the recent passing of your Dad. I just want to say that I’m sorry for your loss, I truly am.

With regards to your posted question, I do think that as June 23 is a milestone birthday for your sister, I would suggest going with June 16th. You don’t have to be the one to make an announcement or recognize that it’s Father’s Day. You can type up something in your wedding program, have the DJ/band leader announce it or have the Maid/Matron of Honor or Groomsmen include a reference in the toast. That way, you can have a private moment of reflection about YOUR Dad, but not be the one who has to say anything to your guests.

That said, should you choose to go with June 23 – there is NOTHING wrong with including your sister in the celebration. You could have a special cake wheeled out for her and definitely sing Happy Birthday. I think it would be a charming and special celebration!


Post # 5
8722 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think if it was any other birthday than an 18th/21st and was anyone but immediate family I would say go for the 23rd but since it is your sisters 18th birthday (and like your wedding day for you it is a big milestone event in her life) I would go for the 16th.

Personally I think it would be a nice homage to your father to be married on fathers day but I also think that some people may rsvp no due to it being fathers day.

Could you move you day to the Saturday instead to avoid all of this?

Post # 7
539 posts
Busy bee

Tough call. I would stick with the 16th, or maybe try and do the 30th of June, should be a Sunday as well. Or see if a Friday has the same discounted rate, do at a lot of venues. I wouldn’t do June 23rd, as it is a pretty big day for your sister, and if she is at a 5 now…when it gets closer, she will be a 10, trust me! Or maybe a Thursday wedding?

Post # 8
2783 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@CardsBride13:  What about a Friday night? Usually there is a discount there too….

If you don’t like that idea, I would go with Father’s Day…assuming your wedding is later int he day most people tend to do stuff int he am-brunch,e tc, so I think that would work better.

Post # 9
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@CardsBride13:  First, I am so sorry for your loss.  Personally, I think a Father’s Day wedding would be a wonderful nod to your dad.  You would have time to decide on the details, but I think something written in your program, or a small speech by a family member or friend recognizing all fathers- and giving special tribute to your own- would be really emotionally satisfying on your wedding day and for years to come. 

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