Post # 1
Maybe this shouldn’t bother me but it does. I find it rude. I have FB, I use it, but I am not an everyday user, nor do I post or make public my personal life. I don’t think it’s wrong that people do that at all, I am just not one of those facebookers that puts a lot to do with my life on there, but that isn’t to say I don’t status post or post pics of my pets 🙂
When we learned we were expecting DH and I agreed we didn’t want to post it all over FB, we have alot of ppl on our FB that we worked with , and went to high school with, and not to say that I am not friendly with these people we just didn’t want to make it public to people that we weren’t really close with. We sent an email out to our friends and family about the baby, I mean we didn’t say oh we are keeping this off FB, but we also didn’t think we needed to tell people that. IMO, if you don’t see the FB posts about the baby then it’s pretty assumed that the person didn’t annouce it on FB. I’ve never ever put anything that remotely implies we are having a baby, but a few cousins and some friends will take posts that I post and comment and make it baby related, I go and delete the comments, but they continue to do it.
Would this bother others? It’s not that I am trying to keep my pregnancy a secret, but I am a High Risk pregnancy so that is a big reason I don’t want it public, but I just can’t understand how people take it upon themselves to make other people’s personal life public. Just a mini rant! lol
Post # 3
Unfortunatley you have to be careful who you tell when you are still early in your pregnancy and how you tell them. You gotta be clear about secrecy and facebook silence. Its sad, I know!
So sorry just keep deleting and stay positive!
Post # 4
Some people display their whole lives on FB and just don’t understand that not everyone wants to do that. I have cousins and aunts who will post every private detail of their lives on FB and don’t see anything wrong with it. I’ve had to hide their status messages because I just don’t want to see it. I think that you should send those people a message and let them know that you don’t want to discuss the baby on FB instead of just deleting their comments. It sucks that you have to remind people not to display your whole life for the internet to see, but unfortunately it’s a sign of the times.
Post # 5
I totally understand… I deleted most of the people I had on facebook a year ago for the same reason. I use it to post pictures to share with family and friends and it started to bother me that someone I went to high school with who I only sort of knew then and haven’t spoken to in 10 years would know when I was engaged, see my wedding pics and then know when Baby J was due.
I would definitely be annoyed if I were you too… if someone hasn’t posted about their pregnancy on fb, then it’s certainly not your place to do it for them! Can you let the people who keep doing it know you’d like them to stop? Or you could always just delete them 🙂
There’s a privacy function too where you can disable the wall posts, so no one can post on your wall. At least another option!
Anyway, just wanted to say I’m with you… it’s inappropriate and very annoying!
Post # 6
@ams12: If it’s just a couple of people I would probably mention to them “hey, we havent really announced it to the world. Please don’t post on FB about it”. Otherwise, I think you can restrict their settings so they can’t comment on your posts. Maybe thats an option?
This is my pet peeve too. A friend of mine announced my engagement on facebook.
Post # 7
This would bother me too. My sister and I got into a mini fight over this as I don’t want wedding details on FB. I would just send a message to the “offenders” expressing that you don’t want to publicize the pregnancy for the reasons you stated. I, too, feel like it should be common sense. I haven’t made any statements on FB about the wedding but I am sure when our STD go out in a couple of weeks people will post.
Post # 8
Thanks ladies, I’ve said something to a few people, but it seems as I get closer to my due date more and more friends are saying stuff so I need to address it with them. Like others have said it’s the common sense factor and how it just goes out the door!
Post # 9
I totally understand and would feel the same way if I were in your shoes. Some people just don’t get it. They think it’s totally appropriate to broadcast anything they want all across FB without considering anyone’s privacy. I’m really glad I didn’t even set up an account until several months after I got engaged, otherwise it would have really annoyed me if people ‘announced’ it for me.
I also don’t like to be tagged in pictures. I always ask people first before tagging them or even posting pictures or videos. Some people actually prefer to keep it off FB, so good thing I asked! But I am in the habit of while someone is taking a picture of me saying “please don’t post this on fb!” Because people just don’t get it.
Post # 10
When I gave my mom the go-ahead to email everyone on her side of the family, she put a note asking people not to comment about it on Facebook, and no one did.
After about 4-5 months, I started to get a comment here or there from friends- a few happy mother’s day wishes (this is my first baby) some congratulations over finding out that it’s a girl, etc. I haven’t directly referenced being pregnant nor put any pictures of myself up since I’ve been pregnant, but anyone reading my wall would probably get the idea I was based on the few comments on there. I don’t really care though… I don’t see the goings-on in my life as highly privileged information. Plus, my friends list is pretty small- I’m not one of those people who have 800+ friends .
If you really want to keep it private and you can’t trust people not to respect your wishes, you can disable the feature that lets people post on your wall, at least for now.
Post # 11
I think you should specifically tell them that you dont want anything baby related on facbeook.
Post # 12
Why not remove your wall? It sounds like you’re not a huge facebook user anyway. You could also restrict your wall to close friends only.
I agree though, I would never say anything about someone’s pregnancy, engagement, etc. unless they already posted some on fb (or their wall was completely covered with it already by other people).
Post # 13
This happened to me…we were keeping it a secret except from immediate family. Well, my aunt told my cousin, my cousin told my old boss, and my old boss was the first person to comment on my facebook!
Luckily we were only one week shy of the 12 week mark where we were going ot make it official anyway…so it wasn’t so bad but I thougth the same thing! Like look at my facebook and see that i haven’t mentioned it yet and KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT! private message me congrats rather than comment!
Post # 14
Removing your wall isn’t going to stop them from posting comments elsewhere, which you indicated was an issue. I would just send a friendly e-mail out to those people who have been doing it and ask that they send well wishes to your e-mail instead because you aren’t comfortable discussing your pregnancy on FB.
Post # 15
You’ve given them too much credit. You would “assume” to keep it off FB; the same cannot be said for others.
Post # 16
Since your not a huge user I would suggest removing your wall like AB Bride
said. That way you can only get private messages, if someone wanted to contact you. Or I would just deactivate your account in the meanwhile.