(Closed) FBIL gf wants to wear Ivory lace dress and my dress is lace….

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

I’m a little confused. Does she want to wear it to her own wedding or to yours? If it’s to your wedding, then that dress sounds pretty inappropriate to wear as a guest to a wedding. 

Post # 6
Member
812 posts
Busy bee

@cherryblossomlove: You’re a better woman than me – I’d be devastated if someone did that at my wedding. I personally would tell her it’s not on – it’s just bad manners for any woman other than the bride to wear white to a wedding (without first asking permission from the bride)

Could just be me

Post # 7
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yeah, that’s odd and a little attention-seeking, IMO. I’d be annoyed as a bride, but she’ll be the one looking silly. If I were a guest, I’d totally be giving her the side eye and think she was being jealous/desparate. 

Post # 8
Member
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@indibee: i completly agree. i would totally be wondering what that girls problem is

Post # 10
Member
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

she wants to wear the dress she planned on wearing to her own wedding to yours?  and she thinks that’s ok?  I would probably tell her she was uninvited unless she changed her choice of clothing but that’s just me.

Post # 13
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@cherryblossomlove:I assume that you both may attend the same wedding or two between now and your wedding. I’d clue in Future Mother-In-Law and Fiance, and pounce on any chance to ‘whisper talk’ about gals that show up in white. If FBIL’s Girlfriend is quick on the uptake, she might change her mind on this one.

Or, put extra servings on her Thanksgiving plate 😉

Post # 14
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

I’d kindly ask her to find another dress. An ivory lace dress that she intended to wear for her own wedding is inappropriate to wear to yours. 

Post # 15
Member
4014 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Can your Fiance say something? I would really not be ok with someone wearing white/ivory on my day. Clearly, she has issues with the “your getting married and I’m not” dress move here. Especially if its bridal enough that she was planning on wearing it as a bride herself.

Gotta be blunt girl. Shutta down.

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