(Closed) FBIL mental health issues…advice appreciated (long)

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

My older sister has struggled with alcohol and abuse and mental health issues for about 10 years. The biggest thing I have learned along the way is that you can’t make someone get help if they truely aren’t committed to it. Unfortunately this is a life long condition with many ups and downs. The best thing you can do for your Future Brother-In-Law is to be there for him when he needs support and to let him know that you both believe he has potental to do good. Everyone talks about “hitting rock bottom”, but to be honest people with these conditions can get there over and over again and have to make the decision to work to get better. At those times justmake sure that he knows how much you all love hime and would do anything to help him.

Post # 5
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It is really hard. for many years I was the only one in my family that would admitt or address the fact that my sister really had a problem. I was told by my dad that I was overreacting and that she was just being young. Finally after her 4th DUI and being in the hospital related to her mental health issues did anyone else talk to her about this. there were times that she would call inthe middle of the night and couldn’t even understand her and then noone would hear from her for weeks, not knowing if she was even alive.

I learned that me telling her she needed help andtrying to get her help when she wasn’t ready didn’t help her. She agreed to go to AA and you know what, she made friends that she would go and drink with. What did help though was giving her someone to talk to when she needed it and letting her know that there are going to be times when she is going to makea mistake, but that we will still love her.

Also talk with your Fiance and others affected by this and encourage them to get help too. It is really hard on the families surrounded by this.

Post # 7
Member
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

He sounds like he’s been in crisis mode already and chances are it is likely to happen again unfortunately.  I would suggest the next time he is in danger to himself to have him hospitalized, maybe that will be the wake up call that this is not healthy.  Outside of that there’s not much you can do unless he’s willing to change or wants help or acknoweldges that he has a problem.  But, you can talk to you Fiance about possibly bringing up to his family the seriousness of the situation and that ignoring it can be dangerous.

Post # 8
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

Al anon is a great place for family members of alcoholics.

Post # 9
Member
7779 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

My Future Mother-In-Law is an alcoholic and a recovering drug addict with some serious mental health issues. I really dont have that much contact with her, though. Fiance does not have much of a relationship with her and since he lives out of state now, I don’t see any of his family.

Post # 10
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

One thing I’ve learned about alcoholics is that they often black out and don’t remember the events that cause their friends and family to worry…

Is there any video of him acting out under the influence?

The topic ‘FBIL mental health issues…advice appreciated (long)’ is closed to new replies.

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