Post # 1
Hi, I’ve been on here a while reading but never posted and there’s always great advice … So, DH and I have agreed to start to TTC in October & I am so excited (timing is due to studying/finances, otherwise we’d just go for it now). I’ve come off my contraception and I’m still waiting for my first period after 10 years without – it’s been 2 months off everything now so just playing the waiting game (this isn’t helping me worrying either).
My question is did anyone else feel horribly fearful about TTC? I’m so terrified it won’t happen for us for some reason… I know we can’t know until we try but it’s keeping me awake at night worrying because I want it so bad. It’s so surreal having no control over something so major.
I have extremely mild endometriosis which might cause problems but probably not, and otherwise nothing indicates that there should be issues but I just have this huge fear. Is this normal, did anyone else experience this? Is there any way past it?
Ps. Sorry if anyone saw this I had posted then deleted before, I don’t want any friends to identify me so made a new account & reposted
Post # 2
I just wanted to post so you know youre not alone and say that I feel this way too. Ive been on my pill for 12 years and we plan on TTC next year which is when I would come of my pill. I think its mainly a fear of the unknown and theres not alot we can do about it, we just have to take it as it comes especially in regards to infertility fears.
Post # 3
You’re not alone. We’ve been trying for four months and at month two I was pretty much going “Omg I’m a useless broken shell of a woman!!! I am a barren wasteland!!!”
Of course this isn’t rooted at all in logic.
Post # 4
going off this xmas after 10 years on the pill. Couldnʻt share your feelings more!
Post # 5
@Kate127 & @slomotion
Thank you ladies so much, there’s relief just knowing I’m not alone… all I’ve heard until now is people who are just so excited to TTC and don’t seem to be worried at all (I know that could well be on the surface, behind closed doors they probably feel like us)… I have a friend who is TTC soon and she keeps sending me nursery decor pics and things and it’s just making me feel worse
@slomotion fingers crossed that it happens soon for you, I think I’ll feel exactly the same when we are finally TTC if it takes any time at all!
Post # 6
Yup. I’m 36 and we’ve been trying for 5 months. We are actually in the process of starting our infertility workup given my age. I feel pretty dysfunctional as a woman right now, but I’ve been worried about it for years now.
Post # 7
Oh sorry I clearly haven’t mastered tagging people on here yet
Post # 8
I’m so sorry you feel that way, I hope that it happens for you soon but it’s also good they’re seeing you earlier for the testing for peace of mind. Fingers crossed for you x
Post # 9
Yep! I was on BC for over 10 years, and even when I came off initally I had a feeling I’d be one of those people who had problems getting pregnant. Sure enough, I am.
Post # 10
This is EXACTLY where I’m at now!!! SO scared! I want it so so so badly and am terrified that it’s not going to happen.
Post # 11
All I can say is I feel the same. I came of the pill after 10 years last January and was lucky to get steady periods straight away but it hasn’t stopped me worrying.
We aren’t TTC yet but are planning to from October this year. I don’t think it helps that we could have started trying early next year but waited as we had a few other things to get done. So if it ends up taking a year or more to get pregnant I will wish we had started trying back then after all…
Post # 12
I was on the pill for 14 years and I share/shared the same fears. We got pregnant our first cycle trying but it ended in a chemical this last weekend, and now I’m even more afraid even though I know that it’s extremely common and at this point actually indicates good things about our fertility. I am trying to remain positive as we go into this next cycle but yes, the anxiety is real!
Post # 13
I felt the same way. I just kept reminding myself that I am healthy women with regular periods- and the only way to know if you are fertile is to TTC. It helped once I added OPKs to find out that I was actually ovulating. It took me 5 months to get pregnant, which I think is around average, but felt like an eternity. Each month of a BFN was a let down, but it made me know for sure how much I wanted a kid. Originally I thought had I not been able to naturally conceive I would take it as a sign it wasn’t for me (because I was never one of those people that ALWAYS wanted to be a mom), but knowing how much it hurt when it wasn’t happening made me know that I really desperately wanted to have a family. We decided after a year, we would pursue a fertility doctor, and if it wasn’t going to happen easily would look into both IVF and adoption. We did some research online and while adoption spoke to my heart louder than IVF, we thought realistically IVF would be more financially feasible (even though both are equally expensive, we could have a payment plan for IVF). We were so fortunate to be able to naturally conceive and not need our plan B, but having that plan in place made me feel less fearful because we knew we would do whatever it took to start our family. Good luck!
Post # 14
We struggled with infertility for 2 years and so I get it. We needed IVF to conceive and because of that I feel strongly about having a natural birth (I want part of this process to feel natural for myself at least). But for those of you who feel like you are broken or less of a women DON’T! First of all, until you’re both tested you don’t know if you’re even the one with the problem. Second of all, whatever the cause it’s a medical issue not a measure of your character or worth.
Post # 15
i was on the pill for 14 years. as soon as i stopped my period came back with perfect 28 days cycles. when i started ttc the issues started, i started spotting 3-5 days before AF and a fibroid was found. i was told it might or might not be a issues. 2 years and 7 fertility treatments (meds, iui, and ivf) we were finally pregnant with DS. now i am pregnant with #2 after an FET.
you will never know until you start trying and no use stressing months ahead of time.
relax and enjoy the first few months of TTC before you start to go crazy.