- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014
I got engaged in the beginning of April and I am SO EXCITED. I’d been “waiting” since we went ring shopping in January and I was so happy to be able to finally tell everyone and start planning. We are planning for a long engagement (sept-oct of 2014) but I’m currently unemployed and looking for a job, so we decided that it was cool if I hit the ground running as far as planning goes even though we are WAY too early because it gives me something to do and makes me happy.
I’ve told everyone and have gone into a bit more detail with the three ladies who have said they were interested (my mom, my sister and my best friend). FI and I have been compiling our guest lists and checking out a few venues where we live and I am visiting home this weekend to check out a few more.
Yesterday I made a private group for the wedding on facebook and added my mom, sister, best friend and Fiance. I asked him if he would like me to add anyone from his side, but he said no because one of them is getting married in June and he’d rather wait until after that to put any focus on our wedding planning. This morning I posted our working guest list and a venue search doc which had what we think of the venues we’ve seen as well as the menu options for each of the venues.
My sister saw them and posted in the group I either had way too much time on my hands or I was being a bridezilla. I replied that I had way too much time on my hands and explained that we were getting a head start on planning because once I got a job it will be more difficult. She posted back that I was still being a bridezilla.
Maybe I’m the only one, but I see being called a bridezilla the equivilant of being called an over-controlling bitch. I sent her a pm explaining the way I took it and said if she really felt I was being that way to tell me privately but not to post it on a board and offered that if she’d rather not hear about so much stuff, let me know and I can take her off the group until we get closer.
She got upset and removed the post (which I thanked her for) and said she wouldn’t post on the board at all anymore, but doesn’t want to be removed because she does like seeing what we are doing.
I feel bad. Am I being bitchy here? Should I hold off on sharing information until we are within a year or 6 months or whatever is normal? Should I just put off planning entirely until then? I see such a negative connotation to “bridezilla” and am really worried that people think that, I don’t want to come across that way at all. When I am going home, my parents are coming with me to appointments at 3 venues. The appointments have already been made, but maybe I should stall on things after those?
I do realize that no one is going to think my wedding is as important as I do. But I remember my mom being a little upset when my sister didn’t include her more. I thought that by being inclusive of the really close people I’d avoid drama, but it seems there is drama no matter what you do.