- 10 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
So I will try and keep what is a long story short.
my Parents are divorced, have been since I was five… grew up with my mom had a relationship with my Dad.. I’l be it a minor one.. am getting to know him better as an adult.
OKay based on all that I decided probably when I was about 16 that I wanted my Mom to walk me dow the aisle, if anyone has the right to “give me away” it is my mom.I told my Dad this and he is okay with it. (He and I will still have a father daughter dance)
Fast forward to now… STD’s went out 2 weeks ago and no one from my fathers side is on our guest list except my great-grandmother, and great-aunt. (both of which have still been a part of my life regardless of my parents seperation)
I didn’t really think about it becuase when I sat down to write a guest list, people I didn’t know, or weren’t in my life, weren’t on my mind, and didn’t make it on the list.
now all the sudden I am feeling guilty that my Dad had a mother, father step-mother, brother and half-sister… none of whom are invited because although we share a blood line that is about it.
My Dad says he understands and isn’t offended, and that “if he didn’t get an invite he is crashing the thing, but beyond that it is my choice and he will support me no matter what”
So why then the feeling in the pit of my stomach? Why do I feel like such a bad person? they aren’t in my life aside from the occasional funeral (sadly that is NOT an exageration) and frankly the lot of them are either drunks, drugies, crazy or some combination of the three… (well to be fair my “grandfather” has been clean for years but guess what I DON”T KNOW HIM!) I want to be a good daughter and honor my dad and I feel like somehow when everything is said and done I don’t want him to feel somehow upset that he didn’t get to walk me down the aisle AND none of his family was even invited. I love my dad, and I want to make him proud, I hope he knows that and can see that in other things.
I just don’t want to worry about it and I won’t miss them if they aren’t there… I just can’t shake this guilty feeling.