(Closed) Feeling a bit blue

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
314 posts
Helper bee

I have been with my guy 9 years and still “waiting” I believe that if you have the guy you love why rush? He loves you and you love him, just give him time. dont pressure him

Post # 4
1339 posts
Bumble bee

Oh man I wish I had advice but I feel just as blue. We’ve been together though for longer and even had a split of nearly a year. I regret taking him back without a proposal but SO just isn’t that type of guy. Every thing has to be honky dory for him and “feel” right whatever that means. I know he loves me but it seriously sucks to be the one who was more open about getting married. Maybe I learned that from the movies that guys were suppose to initiate it? My ex husband did.

I read the other day that expectations just cause heartache. Just know you are not the only one feeling this way. Try to do some nice things for yourself this weekend.

Post # 5
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Expectations cause heartache when they arent communicated.  He can’t meet a need if you don’t tell him what it is.  But……………..  if once you communicate it, he says he is not ready for whatever reason, then you must respect that.  Let’s be realistic, if often takes a little longer for the male to get there, because right wrong or in different, they were born to be providers and often times they want their circumstances, ie money and the like to be in perfect condition before they go that route. 

Having said that, don’t let your family put pressure on you…. I would avoid those dialouges because that pressure will create tension in your relationship with your SO and but a wedge between you.  Family means well and they want the best, but we hurt our loved ones when we put that pressure on them, whether it is to get married, or have a baby, or just date. 

Post # 9
314 posts
Helper bee

@kanneb:  ah I see, I am younger than you. I get the whole clock ticking thing though. My Mom had me in her mid 30s and my sis in her early 40s dont worry so much it will happen

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