(Closed) Feeling a little left out at work.

posted 7 years ago in Career
Post # 3
Member
2205 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I’m sorry. This situations sounds really difficult :-(. The best thing might just be to try not to think about it and have your fun outside of co-workers.

Post # 4
Member
4583 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

If it makes you feel any better, I don’t really socialize with any of my coworkers outside of work, though sometimes I’d like to.

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Aww, that sucks. I have been there, actually there now with some of my “friends”.  I’m pretty bummed about not getting invited to a wedding that I was sure we were going to , and I was downright excited to go to. Its a month from tomorrow, and I’m certain we would have gotten the invite by now. Hubs is indifferent, but I’m a little miffed. We used to hang out with these 2 all the time, but it seems like now, that whole crowd has moved on. I guess because we don’t like to go downtown to the bar every other weekend, we’d rather hang out at home and save money and drink here, or at someone’s house. So I know all too well how you feel right now.

I wouldn’t let them see that it upsets you, and try not to let it get to you. Maybe when they are talking about it, say something like, “tubing sounds like so much fun, I’ve always wanted to go but haven’t had the chance yet.” and leave it at that. It shows you are interestd, but you aren’t flat out asking to go. Be subtle about it, and hopefully they will get the hint.

Post # 6
Member
46382 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

These people’s behavior sounds so high school.

Make friends outside of your work colleagues.

 

Post # 7
Member
858 posts
Busy bee

awww *hugs* i’m sorry. when did you go back in time to high school? lol I wouldnt worry about it because it seems like they wouldnt be your real friends anyway plus just think this keeps you out of all the bs in the work place

Post # 8
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@julies1949: kinda harsh, it might sound high school but its still so difficult when you feel left out and alone.  Work is just work, but for the majority of people its a place you spend a minimum of 35-40 hours a week so of course what happens there is going to affect you! 

OP, I would suggest maybe trying to cultivate friendships with others that aren’t in the clique – you say its about 1/2 the store that does this stuff together, well maybe on days when that happens, invite one of your other coworkers out to the movies or over to your place for dinner. The best defense against cliques is to not buy into them.  Even cultivating new friendships with members of the clique is a good idea – they probably are oblivious to the fact that they are leaving you out, and if you can become better friends with one or two of them, you might find yourself included.  And if not, still try and surround yourself with great people!

Good luck – i understand how you’re feeling all too well and I’m sorry.

Post # 9
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Do you actually want to hang out with these people? From the way you call them a clique (I’ve never known that to be a favorable term) and bring up items like the dating in the same store and promotion, I wonder if you actually want to be friends or are just jealous. That could come across in your actions, and if them inviting you along stopped after that, it may explain why.

Regardless, it’s more than likely they don’t even realize they’re excluding you – if you want to go tubing with them, the next time they talk about it, express interest in going. If they blow you off, find some other people to hang out with.

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