Feeling a little rejected by some of his family members

posted 1 year ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 2
Member
400 posts
Helper bee

How old are you both? She is seven years older, maybe she thinks you are too young to be too serious?  For some reason she has not taken to you, is not reciprocative to your attempts at friendship, which either means she doesnt think you are long-term, or she’s acting already to plant a doubt in his mind about you and keep you short-term. How close are they and does he seem to regard her opinion highly?

If your relationship is solid, I wouldnt worry too much, as she may just be a concerned sister looking out for her sibling. I would get a nice gift and try to be pleasant. I’d also be a little wary about her though.

Post # 3
Member
2917 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

tsiv23 :  How old are you and how long have you been together? How many times have you met her? She might just be an overprotective sister.

I’d definitely go to the birthday party and kill her with kindness.

Post # 4
Member
2254 posts
Buzzing bee

Not everyone is going to like you, and you won’t be able to make every individual who dislikes you come around. 

If you try to force interaction between yourself and this woman, you will make yourself look insecure, attention-seeking, and maybe even like he really should be cautious because you’re behaving in an irritating and possibly strange way. 

This woman doesn’t need to talk to you and she doesn’t need to be your friend. Likewise, you don’t need to prove yourself to her. You’re not in a relationship with her, and his parents — the people who matter the most of those involved in raising him — approve of you and like you.

If you want to demonstrate to her that you’re not a danger or a threat of some sort — which you don’t need to do — think long-term: be the decent person you are, and treat your boyfriend with respect, and over time it’ll be clear that you’re not up to anything. Be you. That’s it. That’s all you can do, it’s all you need to do, and that’s really all you should do.  This doesn’t mean she’ll like you, that she’ll want to be friends with you, or that she’ll think he doesn’t need to be cautious, but you’ll have demonstrated to her and everyone around what kind of person you are. There’s nothing more to do; you can’t force people to change their opinions or see you how you want to be seen.

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