(Closed) Feeling a little sad about my shower

posted 9 years ago in Parties
Post # 15
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I only have 4 confirmed for my bachelorette party in 3 weeks, and 1 is me.  Feel better now?  LOL

Post # 16
Member
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I feel no sympathy ’cause I’m only having 10, one bridesmaid isn’t coming because she just doesn’t want to (at least that’s what I gathered from our conversation)

Post # 17
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I understand how you feel.  My invite list was 28 and we haven’t sent out invitations yet but I already know just from talking to my friends that a solid 10 of them won’t be able to come.  I completely understand this because i am having a Destination Wedding wedding and most of my friends are coming to my bachelorette, but this means that most of the people at the shower will be my fiance’s close female friends and then some very close family on my side.  I think 15 or so people is a good amount, but what makes me feel like a loser is that there will be so few of my friends there, so I totally understand how you are feeling. 

Post # 18
Member
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think that 20 is a perfect number. We only invited 20 and I am expecting 10-13ish. I was having the same pity party for myself about it the other day. This thread is making me feel better though. It seems to be pretty normal to have about 10-20 people at a shower. You wil have a great time!

 

Post # 19
Member
915 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m having probably 10 people at mine, and I’m pretty happy with that number.  The people who can’t make it….. 4 out of my 5 bridesmaids can’t make it because they’re out of town ๐Ÿ™  1 girl at work said no cuz she has plans with her bf that day, like she can’t just hang out with him anytime.  2 other girls probably won’t make it cuz they are having babies close to that date.  It’s kind of a bummer having a low % turnout, but I fully expect to have fun anyway, as I’m sure you will!

Post # 20
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would not take it completely personally. Some people just don’t like showers. They aren’t into the games and the oohing and aahing over gifts and whatever. Some probably think they shouldn’t come if they can’t get you a nice gift, and can’t afford to get a wedding and a shower gift. Sadly, I have been in that boat.

Regarding most of your Mom’s friends coming, I would look at this as a great opportunity for you to get real wisdom or advise from women who have been in the marriage game a long time. One thing I might recommend is, asking the ladies to all write down something under the topic of What I know now, that I didn’t know then-regarding weddings and marriage and relationships. You can have them write for 10 minutes then read them outloud, or not. I think you will find, after your shower that everyone who you needed to be there, was there, and that the number was perfect.

Post # 21
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I kind of felt that way about my showers.  I had two and the first one was like 12 people and the second was maybe 14.  And that was a really nice number.  It was just enough people to seem like a good number, but it still seemed intimate.  I had a really good time at each one!

Post # 22
Member
10361 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

That’s a lot of gifts.

Because I live far away from my family/old friends, I only had my SIL and my 3 best grad school friends at my shower. And I was so happy about it! No pity party necessary.

Post # 23
Member
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I was just in the same situation as you (like literally, almost exactly the same numbers).  But the summer is a very hectic time and i am so grateful for those people that did block off a summer weekend day for me, since i know schedules do not always allow!  Of course, i’m the girl who always tries to go to these things, and always sends a gift if i can’t make it, but i do realize other people don’t think that way.

I hope you have an AMAZING time at your shower!! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 24
Member
321 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

you should feel good with 19~!  I’d be lucky to even have 5 show up. seriously, i have 0 relatives here and i’m really antisocial and i do not have a lot of close girl friends. I have a lot of fenale acquaintances, but unfortunately the people who i tried to be closer too are not as interested in being friends with me. Of course I feel sad about it when big events in my life come up like this….my bridesmaids are planning a nice shower for me…but i too know that not many will show up…my guest list was only like ten people to begin with which includes my mom and sister in law…soo yeah i’m lame! at least my three bridesmaids care about me and are planning a bach party and shower for me. I go through phases where i am sad about it, and then later i realize its okay to be alone sometimes! haha anyways. i hope you feel bettter because you will still be getting 19 shower gifts..haha.

Post # 24
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

20 is a GREAT number – more manageable and more intimate. Try to see your glass as half full rather than half empty – not only are you getting married but your mother is going to be there with you! ๐Ÿ™‚ Summer schedules are difficult and friends who are definitely going to be there for you at the wedding might not feel it’s crucile to be there at a shower.

I generally tend to find that the shower is more for the mother of the bride to show off her daughter than it is for the bride – just my personal experience over the years. Hang in there – your big day is almost here! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 25
Member
321 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

you should feel good with 19~!  I’d be lucky to even have 5 show up. seriously, i have 0 relatives here and i’m really antisocial and i do not have a lot of close girl friends. I have a lot of fenale acquaintances, but unfortunately the people who i tried to be closer too are not as interested in being friends with me. Of course I feel sad about it when big events in my life come up like this….my bridesmaids are planning a nice shower for me…but i too know that not many will show up…my guest list was only like ten people to begin with which includes my me, mom and sister in law…soo yeah i’m lame! at least my three bridesmaids care about me and are planning a bach party and shower for me. I go through phases where i am sad about it, and then later i realize its okay to be alone sometimes! haha anyways. i hope you feel bettter because you will still be getting 19 shower gifts and no matter waht it’ll be fun for you..you will have support from those who care!

Post # 27
Member
729 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I threw a shower for a bride and she made us rent out a place b/c so many people would show up that we couldn’t have it at her parent’s house. less than 20 people showed up which included her and the groom and bridal party. It was a honey do shower

Post # 28
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

There’s only been a few RSVP’s of about the 20 or so people invited to my shower that is next weekend.

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