(Closed) Feeling ambushed! Need some advice… wedding date approaching

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee

No no no no.

In fact, I would cancel the lunch and send her an explanatory email in avoidance of bending or – worse – having a fight in a public place.  

Why should you share your wedding!?  You get ONE day to recognize your wedding and anniversary, to share/display your happiness and love with your friends and family.  It’s not JUST about the family from out of town – it’s also about your photos, your fiance’s family (who probably doesn’t know your cousin and all the people she wants to invite), your dress not competing with another bridal dress, your wedding not competing with another wedding.

She’s either really cheap or naive.  I really hope it’s the naive one.

Post # 33
Hostess
3933 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I can’t believe she was actually serious. She is the crazy one bee, please don’t feel bad at all.

Post # 34
Member
509 posts
Busy bee

I’m gobsmacked.  This woman is out of her mind. You’ve given her the perfect solution (her wedding on Saturday) and it’s too hard? Clearly she is lazy, bossy and extremely inconsiderate. I’m so glad you said no, imagine what sort of a bridezilla she would be on the day.  The family will understand. And she’s put your poor family friend in a tricky situation, that is so unfair.  What a leech.  

Post # 35
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee

Your cousin is NUTS! Thank you for the update. Your fiancee definitely saved the day. Im glad you stood your ground and I think you gave your cousin vible options. I’m extremely happy to hear that your family is seeing your side! Please keep us updated! 

Post # 36
Member
2853 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

OMG after your update your cousin sounds even MORE insane…!!

cray cray

Post # 37
Member
228 posts
Helper bee

Wow! your cousin is self absorbed but not self aware please tell her that. Carry on as you planned and have a wonderful day with those who truly love and care for you and your Fiance.  Congratulations and best wishes.

Post # 38
Member
534 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

smile111:  The good news is that it sounds like your family won’t be upset about you not giving in to her.

As for the rest of it…..wow. Sounds like she wants someone else to throw her a wedding on their dime. Were you to do this, I’d bet she’d add a bunch of guests to the list and not pay very much of the costs, if any. 

Post # 39
Member
1412 posts
Bumble bee

Sounds like she’s lazy and cheap. In that case- tell her to elope! Far far away!

Post # 40
Member
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

I just wanted to say that I’m so glad your family members are supporting your decision to have a wedding alone. 

As for your cousin, it’s a good thing for her that you are not a pushover.  Because she will finally learn a thing or two about “working hard for what you want”.  This one instance will show her that life does not revolve around her and her alone.  🙂  Take heart, this is a good thing. 

Post # 41
Member
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Sooo, was she just trying to be lazy and let you and your Fiance do all the planning and paying, and just show up in her dress, too? Cuz to me, that’s a lot of what it sounded like.

Combined weddings only make sense to me for really special couples with a really strong, special bond, like twins getting married. In any case, if the couples both loved the idea, then it’d be fine. You don’t.

Post # 42
Member
846 posts
Busy bee

smile111:  Really? So was she going to help pay the expenses?

Post # 43
Member
2176 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Now it all makes sense.  she is lazy, cheap and entitled. Got it!

You have every right to having a wedding OF YOUR OWN!!  She needs to kick rocks. 

Post # 44
Member
8818 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Yes, everything   they said – and OP , you have got your stds out haven’t you ?  She is crazy enough for  anything……….

Post # 45
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee

Can’t even believe you offered to let them have their wedding the day after or before yours.  The last thing I’d want to do the week of my own wedding is go to another one.  You are too kind.

Glad you stood your ground.  Good for you.  Now avoid the drama and try your best to ignore her insanity.

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