(Closed) Feeling awkward about showers at work

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 46
Member
4505 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

At my office, when we’re celebrating something in someone’s life, we have a potluck party and all chip in for an amazon gift card. Done. That’s much better than the pressure of individual gifts.

Anyway, I think you should just go to the showers with a smile on your face, enjoy getting to know your coworkers better, give what you can afford (if it’s a recipe, awesome — that’s a great gift!), and don’t apologize for it.

Post # 47
Member
889 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

codysgirl16:  i think office showers are the exception to the rule; they aren’t done because the people invited are all super close. they’re given because the coworkers understand that they obviously aren’t invited to the wedding but want to do something nice for the bride-to-be. and since it’s a shower, of course the give registry info? that’s kind of a thing for showers.

honestly if you don’t want to sit the shower out completely (which would be my first suggestion since you seem to have strong feelings against it), why not give the bride something inexpensive? i mean super cheap. a wedding day first aid kit: bobby pins, a sewing kit, chapstick, tylenol, and a $5 starbucks card and then write a nice card to go with it?

i know you said that your coworkers would talk about you if you didn’t go…but if they’re those kind of people then i’m guessing they’d probably talk too if you didn’t bring a gift. so why not just sit it out or be absent that day or conveniently have a meeting at the time of the shower?

ETA: just had a chance to read all the other comments/your updates. i think it’s totally fine for you to do the cookies/recipe for the upcoming shower too. just personalize the card if you can. but i see nothing wrong with that and it’s a lovely gift! baked goodies are always a hit with me!

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 1 month ago by  MrsHalpert.
Post # 48
Member
2449 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

codysgirl16:  I work in a dept of 200, so at any time there’s 5-10 people getting married, 5-10 having a baby etc. for the people I at least talk to regularly, I give $10-15 toward a group gift and sign the group card and usually don’t go to the shower. I’ll go to showers for closer friends. Works for me. These showers are always after work hours though. To each her own, this works for me!

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