Post # 17
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
From my experiences people are so lame when it comes to batchelorette parties. One of my best friends had her batchelorette a week before her wedding and I drove 6+ hours to attend, and I was the only one not in the wedding party. A bunch of local friends didn’t go eventhough they said they would. I don’t get people.
Post # 18
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
First off, we didn’t have batchlor/bachelorette parties so I don’t know anything about how they usually work. I will tell you what I would do though. If I were you I would make a new invitation or send an email explaining that there will be little to no drinking on your part and what you really want to do is what you listed above but if they still can’t make it you understand. Let them know you wanted to be sure they didn’t get the wrong idea be the previous invite as you weren’t told why anyone gave the answer they did. Don’t let them know it hurt you when she said no one was coming and don’t let them know how she told you. Just say that you would love to see them but if they have prior obligations you understand.
I would be upset too and this is why I would make sure it wasn’t just because of the previous invite said there would be mostly drinking. I hope everything works out.
Post # 19
Member
1876 posts
Buzzing bee
Honestly, don’t be too offended by this. Just because your friends don’t want to go to Vegas doesn’t mean they don’t want to cleebrate with you. It means that they probably don’t have the time to spend a whole weekend away and/or don’t have the money for transportation/hotels/meals/drinking/partying/etc. Vegas is not a cheap town. Even if you drive from LA, with hotels and partyign costs each person would need to expect to spend AT LEAST $300. That’s a lot of money for some people to spend on a weekend.
I think you just need to plan something a bit more low key. Maybe e-mail everyone and say that what’s most important is spending time with your girls and you don’t care where that happens. Say you hope they’d all be up for a relaxing spa day followed by dinner and girls night, and then have your Maid/Matron of Honor plan that.
Post # 20
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
@EllaLooDesigns: Yeah i was thinking of talking with her, but in the end, its how she is. she just doesn’t realize how negative her comments are, but in the end, she’s been my best friend for FOREVER and i still love her to death regardless. it’s just hard not to let those kind of comments get to you. Yes, I did choose Vegas. Actually, it’s a long story, but all in all, I said I wanted to have my bachelorette party in Vegas BEFORE I met my fiance and all my friends knew that, so when came time to plan, they sort of expected it to be there. I don’t mind, because I know some of my maids are looking forward to it. My maids are thankfully ok with going so yeah =) I just want to spend time with them! Thanks for your input!!
@bells: i THINK Vegas is going to be it, but I really am thinking of doing something locally as a seperate thing for one night.
@Atalanta: lol I feel ya. I figured if i were an invitee and I knew the girl well, I’d go for her last “hurrah”. but that’s just me and I am more into showing more moral support for the bride than taking into account how much fun I’d have myself.
@bride21: Thanks for your support! I think I will write an email/have a seperate invite for something local and not explain too much about the vegas thing. I do just want to see people and hang out since I’ve been sorta MIA lately due to some health issues AND planning the wedding ><;; It’s a really good idea and the way to go.
@JrzyGurl: Not offended at all! 🙂 I appreciate your honesty. I totally can see how it could be a HUGE commitment for people, I just think differently than most I guess. But to be honest, the BIGGEST issue I have with this was HOW my Maid/Matron of Honor told me… if she just told me “Oh everyone’s really busy, but you have your maids with you”, I wouldn’t have felt as rejected and “loser-ish” when she told me, you know what I mean? Like they say how presentation is everything, in this case, it cannot be more true. Definetly going to do the email thing like everyone is sugguesting. Thanks so much for your input! I really appreciate it!
Post # 21
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
@ninjajane: I’m glad you like my idea. I can understand feeling overwhelmed by everything. I was pregnant for part of the planning and had to stop the wedding stuff to have my baby and heal so I know it can be hard trying to plan a wedding while not feeling your best. It just made since to me to contact everyone yourself.
Post # 22
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
@bride21: oohh, congrats on the baby!! I just noticed the picture. hehe. So adorable!! 😀 And yeah, its hard balancing trying to stay well and the stress of having things planned, so I just ended up trying to lessen my load by delegating things and leaving it be (like not trying to hover too much). I think this case is quite different though and an email from me won’t hurt =)
Post # 23
Member
6659 posts
Bee Keeper
Sometimes people can be really hurtful without realizing it. I’ve found in these situations it’s best to just accept people as they are and try not to let their actions get to me.
But honestly unless I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in someones wedding, I wouldn’t go to a Vegas bachelorette party. It’s waaay too expensive and also not my scene at all. I mean I fall asleep on the couch at like 9:00pm every night, so how in the heck could I be expected to stay up until 4am? Had I known it was a spa/relaxation trip though.. that might be different. But the $ would still play a huge role in my decision.
Post # 24
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
@ninjajane: Thanks! That’s actually an old picture of him. He’s almost 9 months old now. I’m going to have to update it when we get our wedding pics back. It’s good for you to give other people things to do and letting them choose how to do it. I did that with almost everything I had other people do. It sounds like you are on the right track with your wedding.
Post # 25
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
@moderndaisy: yeah i feel ya. I’m the same way now (sleeping at 9pm lol). I do really love their spas though (esp at caeser’s!) and wanted to try others. they’re also just 50 bucks to go in for a day, so I thought it was something perfect to do other than shopping. I agree though, it’s an expensive trip and i wondered how different it would be if it wasn’t conveyed of as an “drinking all night” trip, but who knows. I think i’ll just do something local for people so they can make it without having to spend money =) Thanks for your thoughts!
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