(Closed) Feeling discouraged and having issues…

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 20
1591 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

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Prettysmile40:  Ugh, that stinks 🙁 My DH had performance anxiety for about 2-3 months and it was awful. He’s gotten a lot better after I quit talking about it so much and stopped telling him when we have to do it. 

Post # 21
2 posts

Frankly… It seems there’s more going on the preformance anxiety. You DH seems completely uninterested in having a baby From your previous posts. What he says and what he does are polar opposites. 

Post # 22
3828 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

My DH was like that at the start. he would think I only wanted him for a baby, which was part of it but also I was horny during that time. But it took us 2 yrs to get pregnant and the longer it took, the more involved he became. By the end we were making sure we both spiced things up during the fertile week so that it was still fun. It’s really important that your DH be on board and is participating

Post # 23
1070 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

It is hard. My dh doesn’t normally like it during the week. Generally weekends are our usual or days off and holidays so it’s pretty obvious when our fertile week is. If I pretended it wasn’t our fertile week and just tried to initiate then he would just put me off until the weekend. Instead I tell him and he just has to suck it up even if he’s tired from working crazy hours! It’s certainly not fun or romantic but we just do it anyway. 

Post # 24
620 posts
Busy bee

My Dh had performance anxiety and low drive issues. He actually went to his dr and got cialis because he was having such a hard time and got really down on himself. It was such a cycle because he freaked out when he couldn’t finish, got scared it would keep happening, then obsessed until it was a self-fulfilling prophecy. Keeping my fertile time a secret didn’t really work for us, but a confidence boost did. It doesn’t have to be meds, but spicing it up, making sure there’s sex other times, and being playful and fun can make a big difference when timed intercourse is getting you both down. 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by  jetsetbee.

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