- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
So last night I found out my friend/bridesmaid/moh is pregnant. I’m happy for her but she’ s due a few months before the wedding. She’s leaving the ball in my court if I still want her in the wedding and I honestly don’t know what to do.
She a good person but has made some not so good choice. I was already disappointed in choosing her because she’s flaked out an going with me and my mom(who lives out of town) to find my dress. The next day I wanted her and my mom to go dress shopping at David’s bridal because I want to see the bm’s dresses next to my moms. She flaked but said she’d go with the in laws and my mom to see our venue that night. You guessed it she flaked.
To go with us dress shopping for my dress she had other plans which was fine. After all she’s allowed to have a life and it was fun for me and my mom. But the next day she didn’t want o get up early (I made a 10am appointment after checking with her a month before for a good time and day to go) and then was busy to go see the venue.
I’ve been good about not going over board talking about wedding stuff and I stressed how important that weekend was to me since my mom lives out of town and she promised she’d be there and even seemed excited about it.
im doing a lot of DIY since we are paying for a large part of the wedding ourselves and while I don’t expect her to help I do want her to ask how stuff is going. I don’t want to sound like a bridezilla but I am concerned since I’m already feeling low about her. By leaving it in my court I feel like its some sort of test. She’s a friend but I’m starting to feel like it may be one sided.
Oh I should mention our birthdays are a few weeks apart and we both love doing dinners and celebrating with friends. My fiancé was out of town and I was suffering from my first ever sunburn and was super sick ( my doctor said I borderline gave my self sun poisoning). She wanted to do a big expensive diner for my birthday that I had to politely change (she didn’t offer to pay) and which she decided to bail on las minute (literally recieved a text 5 minutes before we were suppose to meet saying cant make it will make it up. Another friend has a birthday just weeks after mine and I bought my friend a round of drinks because I felt guilty I wasn’t able to attended her birthday but she never did anything for mine. I’m not saying she glad to buy a round of drinks but a card…something would have been nice. My fiancé has invited her and her boyfriend over numerous times where we’ve cook nice meal and entertained them but its never reciprocated.
I think the crowning blow may have been that she keep telling we’re best friends and how lucky she is to have me in her life but then tells me she’s pregnant via text message. Maybe m old school but I would have met her for coffee and broke the news in persguessing.
I’m sorry this is so long but I needed to get it out there. I’m so torn, on one hand it feel like she wants a way out, on the other a test of some sort. It may sound selfish but I was a fun bachelorette party. My fiancé and I work 60+ hours every week each and don’t have a ton of time to relax on the other hand I don’t want to be the only one drinking diner (my other bridesmaid/moh lives out of state and probably won’t make it) and i know we can have fun without drinking but im not a massage kinda girl nor do i want to do just dinner plus she’ll be like 6-7months pregnant. We cant have the party closer to the wedding because i have several business trips in the 3 month leading up to October. Help!