Post # 1
hi ladies, i was hoping for some support / advice.
I love my SO very much & don’t have a doubt in my mind that we will be great. We have a long engagement (21 months) with over a year still to go. At the beginning i sorted some things out the way I would have loved them to be. I’m very budget conscience & didn’t realise how much this affair would actually cost. I wanted to DIY cake. DIY flowers. Preloved gown. Family is very traditional & slowly this is becoming more of a ‘stock standard’ wedding rather than the personalised affair i wished for. Parents have offered to pay for things I never intended on (cake, dress etc) which i am very grateful for but wish i had those funds to spend else where. (live ceremony music vs ipod, video)
Even the honeymoon, one of the things i REALLY wanted, decided to coincide with my 30th birthday, but even that hs been pushed back, & we’ll only be going 3 months after the wedding.
My enthusiam has gone. My mind has reverted to the fact the wedding is for the guests & the honeymoon & actually a well deserved holiday.
I’ve ask Fiance if we can spend some time chatting over the weekend to try & get back to the elated status of gettig married rather than todays ‘ehhh’ feeling about it all.
Suggestions? words of advice?
Post # 3
Oh I’m sorry it feels like it’s becoming less “your” day. Remember, you still have plenty of time to steer things your way and also to find those special little ways to put your stamp on it within the standardness of it. I think it’s a great idea to talk to your Fiance about it even if it’s just as a reminder of what that day will really be about. It’s just one day, after all, in the grand scheme of your marriage, and the marriage is what you’re so excited about 🙂
Do you think your parents are willing to compromise on certain things? Like ok you’ll get the fancy tiered cake they wanted but you really would rather wear what you want to wear? Just asking. Good luck!
Post # 4
I felt like you when I was in the middle of planning. My engagement was a little over a year and at the beginning I wanted to have every detail my way. But after a while everyone tried to suggest things, has better ideas or “just wants to help” and you feel like fine whatever I’ll give in…it also seems soooo far away at that point that you don’t really mind. Mid-planning I also couldn’t hear the word wedding anymore, because everyone asked or had an opinion, but as the date got closer I actually got really excited again! I was anticipating the day and I am sure you will feel the same way! And the cake and such details still have tons of time! So don’t worry too much, that feeling will pass and you can enjoy your wedding and honeymoon!
Post # 5
Yeah, fiance and I ended up not discussing wedding with any family for a few months, then told them “We’ve booked the venue, celebrant, photographer, etc. for April!” I think they were so blindsided by the wedding suddenly appearing out of nowhere that, so far, they haven’t had a chance to argue or try to change any of it.
Post # 6
@HisMoon: Thank you.. as suggested i think we may have a chat about what is really important. I’d convinced them that we don’t need favors so that is a small sucess story 🙂
Post # 7
Oh my gosh, your situation sounds exactly like mine! (except for the age and birthday). As of now we have 18 months, but he proposed 2 months ago. I was sort of expecting it to be honest (I figure things out pretty easy) so when he proposed, of course I was overjoyed, but the next couple of days my mood went back to ho-hum. I love him more every day, but my excitement for being engaged has disappeared so quick! I want to have all decor/cake/etc DIY but I have a very limited budget. My biggest investment will be the photography which means I will not get my dream dress and I have to settle for plan C for my decorations…
My advice? Remember that this day will be one of the biggest of your life. While it’s important to you to have an original wedding custom to your taste and style, it’s the person at the end of the isle waiting to become your spouse that makes the day the Big Day 🙂
Tips: Sometimes, I like to play music I’m interested in having during the ceremony, close my eyes and imagine myself walking down the isle towards my FH and exchanging our vows. It usually sparks my enthusiasm all over again.
Planning a wedding is hard work! It’s no wonder some of us get a little under-enthused from time to time.
Post # 8
@hisluckygirl22: very kind words, thank you x