(Closed) Feeling Gloomy About My Wedding

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I wish I had some advice but I can only say I feel your pain my wedding is coming up soon and we have a lot of other stress in ourice at the moment so the last thing I want to do is get excited about a big stressful time consuming waste of money that I feel our wedding is but its all anyone wants to talk to me about the ask me if I’m excited and then just stare at me expectibe me to drone on about the same thinfo over and over again.

so I guess all I can say is that it is somewhat normal to have these feelings abs you are not alone focus on the marriage after the wedding that’s the important part

Post # 3
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I don’t think you’re abnormal, I put up a very similar post the other day about losing my Maid/Matron of Honor, uninviting my family, dealing with illness during the engagement and etc. I was a lot more excited about wedding planning at the very beginning too and just want it to be over. I don’t have much advice, I’m kinda taking it one day at a time and just trying to remind myself of the things I AM excited for, especially as I’m in the home stretch. But no, you arent weird at all!

Post # 4
736 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2025

It sounds like you have a lot going on and its really sucking the fun out of the planning part of your wedding. I’m sorry to hear you’re having such a crappy time right now.

The issues with the friends is going to be tricky, no matter what. But if your Fiance got into it with his groomsman, then he’s the one who should be dealing with it, not you. I think its okay for you to step back and let them sort this out on their own. And if you lose a groomsman in the process, the wedding isn’t going to fall apart, you’ll just be short one person (and you can replace him with someone else if your Fiance has someone he felt was special enough to him to be up there. Just tell the person honestly, It would mean the world to me if you would do us the honor of standing with me on our day”. Even if someone had dropped out, I’d be honored to be asked to be in a bridal party anyways). It’s upsetting that he may not want to be there to support you on your special day, but don’t let him ruin this for you anymore than he already has (not saying its his fault but clearly the situation is making you sad).

People are going to send RSVPs back wrong, adding people or what have you. My advice to you would be to give everyone the same answer. Either decide that you’re not going to allow it or you will, one way or the other. If you opt to go with the no, then just be firm and tell people that you simply cannot accommodate more people than you have invited. If they fight you, stand your ground, say you’re sorry for the inconvenience, but that’s just how it has to be. And from what I’ve gathered, people not RSVPing on time is common, some people just need a nudge to remember to send back that little card.

If you’re tired of talking about wedding stuff all the time, you can do one of two things (IMHO). 1. Say “it’s a secret” or “we’ve decided to stop talking about it so as to keep it special until the day”. or 2. Be honest and say you’re burned out on wedding talk and then turn the topic of conversation to the other person “So how did your dinner party go last week? Did you have fun?” people will pick up on it that you don’t want to talk and hopefully won’t ask you again. But people are going to ask – the bride who’s wedding I’m attending soon has purposely been very vague about everything and as such, most people don’t ask for details.

Try to take some time to spend with your Fiance during this time. Focus on your relationship and how happy you make each other. Put the wedding talk aside for a few days and just enjoy the time you have together while you’re engaged. Know that all of these bothers will eventually subside and hopefully you’ll be able to regain that joy you had before. What truly matters is that you and your Fiance walk down that aisle together and are joined together in marriage. Everything else is just details.

Post # 5
942 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception / Courtyard Marriott Legacy Ballroom

I definitely don’t think your feelings are weird. And I’m glad other people feel this way! Our wedding is in 11 days, and we still have so many little details to finish up – we’re definitely feeling the stress! Not to mention we currently live apart, so I’m also packing up all my things, getting ready to move in with Fiance – so much to do! I totally hear you about the questions – Future Mother-In-Law cornered me during our wedding shower and started peppering me with questions about wedding details. She feels left out since she lives out of town, but geez, no need for the interrogation! And at least one my co-workers asks about how my wedding planning is going about every day.

I’m really excited to be married and start my life together with Fiance, but I’m not really looking forward to the actually wedding, or at least the reception. It’s going to be so busy, I don’t see how we’re going to have much fun! So, when the stress starts getting to us, we take a break from wedding stuff and focus on us and our future together. We like to talk about what we’re going to do after everything, like planning all the activities we’re going to do on our honeymoon

Post # 6
709 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
petittaam:  I’m glad you created this thread. Not only is everyone asking me about the wedding making me dread it more, but the guilt I feel over dreading wedding talk is making me feel worse. Like you, I totally am excited to marry my best friend, but the actual wedding is giving me high anxiety. It’s just good to know I don’t have to feel guilty about having anxiety over one of the biggest, life changing events. 

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