- 5 years ago
ETA: I feel way better now, the guy’s a jerk, nothing I can do, love my SO. Thanks everyone. I was overreacting, but that’s what the internet is for!
Today I went with my boyfriend to stop by to see a friend/business contact of his. This guy, let’s call him S, is by no means super close to my SO but is part of a larger group of friends that SO has known for a long time. S is about 20 years older than my SO, married with a few kids. I don’t know S well, but I’ve met him a few times, went to a few parties at his house (one of which was THANKSGIVING), and I know his wife a bit better, and she’s very nice.
We stopped by his house, SO introduced me again (which is fine, names are hard) and then sat down to talk about business. As we were about to leave, S asked my SO if I was a “guest” of his. I was a bit shocked, because I thought that he would have least vaguely recognized me, and it’s pretty public information in SO’s social circle that he’s in a serious relationship. SO laughed and said that I’m a “daily guest” and then we left.
I was annoyed, and I knew that SO had gone to a party with S just a few days ago, and I would have been shocked if I didn’t come up at some point in the conversation. I complained to SO that it was annoying to me that S was acting like he had never seen me before in his life, and was acting like he didn’t know SO had a girlfriend.
A bit later, in an effort to make me feel better (oh men), SO told me that at the party the other night, S was encouraging him to hit on girls, so SO “reminded” him that he has a serious girlfriend by showing him some lovey-dovey texts we had exchanged that day.
So that was like THREE DAYS AGO, and S still acted like he had no idea my boyfriend had a girlfriend TODAY!
I know that my boyfriend didn’t do anything wrong, but the whole experience just makes me feel disrespected and gross. Most of SO’s friends are really nice to me, and seem to respect my relationship, but I just felt like this guy was acting like I was some random slut who was interchangable for any other random slut. I want nothing to do with him, I just have never been treated like this before.
I really think he SHOULD have known about me already before telling my boyfriend to hit on girls the other night… I just feel so uncomfortable.
Anyone have any advice on how to deal with unsavory people like this? He and SO are not especially close, but he is in the larger group, so I will have to see him from time to time. UGH.