- 8 years ago
Let me preface this by saying we are having a small wedding – around 75 people, all of which are close family and friends. We are having all 75 for the ceremony, dinner, and reception. I am on a limited budget and am paying per person not only for the dinner but also the food that will be served later on during the reception.
I know some people have reception only invites at other weddings but it is not as common in my area and I would feel rude only inviting people to one part so I chose not to invite my co-workers (I work with about 8 people, most of whom also have spouses that would also need to be invited) as I just don’t have the extra money. I also don’t really spend time out of the workplace with these people. I wouldn’t feel comfortable with having most of them there.
Anyways, now I feel like a horrible person. I found out that apparently some of my co-workers have been talking behind my back and think it’s odd that they are not invited to the wedding; I get the impression they feel they should at least be invited to the reception. They’ve also been joking (at least I hope it’s joking) about crashing the ceremony or reception, which freaks me out. I don’t want people just showing up at my wedding.
One of them spoke for quite awhile about how it’s not a big deal to have people just to the reception, that it was okay for me to do that. Even though I expressed that while I would have liked to invite some of my co-workers, I didn’t feel right inviting some and not all/not inviting them to the whole thing, she continued to discuss it. It was an extremely uncomfortable conversation where I basically felt pressured and kind of guilty that I didn’t do reception only invites.
I deflected it to a certain extent and another co-worker said she would stop joking about crashing the wedding as it seemed to stress me out (obviously!) Yet she joked about it again today. I pretty much ignored it and changed the subject.
Am I a horrible person to have not invited all of my co-workers? Is it just me or is it incredibly rude of them to talk/joke about this with me?? It’s making me super uncomfortable and I’m not sure how to handle it! I’m getting married in a month and I really don’t need this…help!