Post # 1
I don’t know why I’m posting this really, but I just feel the need to get it off my chest…
So my mom, my older sister/MOH, and little sister/flower girl all got together over the weekend to try on our dresses and take some pictures in different lighting to see how the colors of our gowns look together. They look gorgeous, and they should… I picked them all out! Hahaha… my dress is ivory, MOH’s is muted bronze, and the flower girl dress is gold. I love love LOVE my colors, the styles of the dresses… except for one thing.
I’m a tall, curvy woman. Specifically, I’m 5’10”, a size 10, and have 34F boobs. I’ve learned to be ok with this. In the past 5 years, I’ve been down to a size 4 (due to eating disorder/drug use/etc), and up to a size 16 and 200lbs (due to emotional eating). At this time in my life, I’ve resolved all my major issues… I’m healthy, happy, and my Fiance absolutely LOVES my body. However, my beautiful sister/MOH is just that… and when I saw these pictures I wanted to cry.
She is short, petite, blonde, and tan… with an amazing figure that she is CONSTANTLY complaining about. She looks so @#$%-ing beautiful in her dress. And I look like a GIANT standing next to her. I literally look twice her size, and it makes me sad. 🙁 She’s my only bridesmaid, so there’s no possibility of fixing the photos to minimize me and make her look more like a normal human being, hahaha. So today I’ve been freaking out, running all over town looking for undergarments that will slim me down… and I haven’t found anything that fits (due to those 34Fs!). I don’t know.
Anyone else deal with feelings like this?
Post # 3
I’m sorry you are feeling this way but try not to!! You are the one that will steal the show on your wedding day and will truly look beautiful and amazing standing next to your groom!
Post # 4
One thing I have learned is that everybody has something bad to say about their own body. Even the models do.And it’s something i have to constantly remind myself of in this society of body comparisons.
Now, as someone who is practically your size (okay my boobs are now a 34E, but everything else rings true), I can understand your grief. Finding clothes is tough sometimes. But it’s doable–there are specialty bra stores out there. I went to a place called Ann’s Bra Store (they DO sell online) and bought a longline bra in my size. I can sometimes feel like gigantasaur next to some of my friends, who barely come up to my chin. Especially if i’m wearing heels =]. I don’t go to the stores my friends go to–they’re not good for my self esteem because not a darn thing fits properly. Stick to what you know and what is made for your body. If you need a specialty store, find one. Go to it. Love it.
A size 10 is still quite petite, considering how long your frame is. I’m sure there are days your sister wishes she was as tall as you. Days she wishes she had the same color eyes as you. We all do this. Try to focus on the good and be thankful for what you have. Rock the curviness and find things that accentuate it.
Everybody has days like this. Stuff like this used to really really bother me when i was in high school and college. As time goes on, it really becomes more and more moot to me. I hope you come to the same mindset. I just focus on ME, not them. I always tell myself “is their dress a size 2? yes. Is mine a 12? yes. Am i 8 INCHES TALLER?”. Yes. Then i feel kinda silly. Take in all those other factors besides “petite”. Basically, you cannot deny that you are taller and bigger than your sister. You are nearly 6 feet tall, it’s inevitable. Focus on how good YOU look, not how good she looks, and don’t compare yourselves. You BOTH look good. Now repeat!
Post # 5
Girl, you sound like a darn SUPERMODEL to me, lol!!! I know plenty of men who prefer your body type to your sister’s. I understand self-esteem issues and how you are your own worst critic, but your man picked you for some really great reasons. You’re going to be his wifey, and I bet he’s in love with your rockin’ body!
Post # 6
You are going to look so beautiful and stunning on your wedding day, from your description you do sound like a model! Walk with your head held high, because believe me,a lot of shorter girls are quite envious and intimidated by a tall woman. You have presence and a certain air about you that makes us shorter ladies a wee bit green!
Plus you should be proud of yourself for living through so much, thats truly inspiring. You’ve accomplished a lot and survived things that break so many people. I bet you have a soulful presence that speaks volumes without uttering a word.
Maybe if you can take some time away from everyone and treat yourself to something that you love to do and makes you happy. Maybe go to the spa or even just a really nice long walk or jog to clear your head and refocus on what makes you such an amazing person that is getting married to another amazing person!
Post # 8
@MissHay: I don’t have the same height as you, but I am also “blessed” in the breast department (sometimes it is a curse) … but if you go to a specialty bra store they should have corsettes etc in your bra size. I am a 36G and I was able to find one.
Post # 9
I’m sorry you feel bad about how you look. Just remember that everyone looks different and you can be a beautiful woman at different sizes. It sounds like when you were a size 4 you weren’t healthy at all, so why be sad and want to go back to that when you can’t do it in a healthy way?
Post # 10
I completely understand your situation, I am have the same height and breast size as you, but I am a size 14.. There are many things I don’t like about my figure.. Like how hard it is to find tall pants.. How hard it is to find F bras! Finding swim suits that are flattering.. But my boyfriend loves me the way I am and enjoys the large breasts so he doesn’t complain.. I have many self conscious moments and days but sometimes I feel good if a piece of clothing looks nice on me. You learn to find what styles and cuts are flattering on you.
But I would be happy if I was a size 10! You must look amazing.. Have you tried wearing a minimizing bra if you are trying to “slim down” and maybe not draw attention to your breasts? And have your sister wear stellitos haha 🙂 Also, I use Spanx to help slim me down and they are comfy.
My best friend was in the same situation too in a wedding party.. She is the same height and build as me.. (Not as big of breasts though). Yet she was with bridesmaids that were like size 6/8 who were like around 5’4″. She definitely felt like a giant and really awkward.. Like when she stood next to them she felt like a giant.. and when they were trying on dresses the sample dresses fit them fine but she had a bit more of a struggle.. But you take it with a grain of salt and love yourself for what you have..