(Closed) Feeling like a whale. Pic Heavy…

posted 5 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013 - old cheese factory

@KP92714:  dont beat yourself up. you look beautiful. i feel you though as we are our own worst critics. i love all the photos you posted. i too have some pics from my engagement shoot that i was like??? ummm really my roll is hanging out over my pants… ugh. but just remember your Fiance loves you for you, not what you see yourself as.

Post # 6
18 posts

I know how you are feeling. I’ve been down this road with myself many, many times. I too love food and to have a fun time with eating, but I got the motivation to lose weight when I knew that my wedding was drawing closer…it finally felt like I had a real reason to finally lose the weight. I was just thinking to myself how it’s so hard for me to find anything nice about myself but when it comes to anyone else, it’s so easy for me to find things that are lovely about them. 

I agree with langloiswedding2013 when she says that we are our own worst critic…I believe that 100%. That being said, I think you look lovely and I know it’s hard when you see yourself in the mirror or a picture and you feel like…what the heck have I been doing?! I could have been working hard to lose the weight…But you still have the chance to do that if you want to! 

It’s hard TRUST ME…but if it was easy, everyone would be losing the weight and looking the way they want. It’s hard work to lose weight, but in the end I think it’s worth it. Just yesterday, I found some old shorts that I no longer fit in about 2 years ago and I remember needing to buy bigger shorts and I was down about that…but yesterday I found those old shorts, looked at them and cringed as I slid them onto my legs and buttoned the button and zipped them up…they were actually a little bit loose on me! I felt like wow, all this hard work is actually worth it all. You gotta believe in yourself, because you CAN do it, but you gotta really watch your calorie intake and stay away from pasta, bread that kind of stuff and go running! It sucks for a while, but then you get used to it and you will be more fit in no time.

The thing that keeps me motivated is thinking “In a few months, everyone will see me looking great and I will feel happy and comfortable FOR ONCE and I can walk around Disney and have a great time on my honeymoon!”

You should use the MyFitnessPal app or website….trust me it is SO helpful when counting your calories!

Good luck and God bless 🙂

Post # 7
1024 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think the pictures are beautiful. 


Post # 9
2037 posts
Buzzing bee

@KP92714:  OMG I love that you included your dogs in your pics!  

My fav ones here are the second one up from the bottom and 3rd one up from the bottom.

I love the 2nd one up from the bottom because I love fall colors, and how serious you both look in them.

I also love the 3rd one up because it has your dogs in it and it is an action shot and it’s not as stiff as the first picture at the top.

Post # 11
259 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

You look stunning and your Fiance looks handsome as well! Don’t fret it. We are all different shapes and sizes and you my lady are absolutely beautiful. –Don’t ever doubt that.

Post # 12
61 posts
Worker bee

You look beautiful, happy and in love in those pics! Don’t beat yourself up!

Post # 13
49 posts

I apologize in advance for how long this is, but I couldn’t help it. I’ve been there. Even if you don’t read all of it, read the first and last paragraphs. They are the most important.


First and foremost, I think these pictures are adorable. I especially love the one of your fiance kissing your forehead and the one of you on the woodpile leaning against his back with your arms around his shoulders. Listen to the person who said that we are our own worst critic. Don’t stress about losing weight. I know from personal experience the self-disgust and self-loathing that comes from hating your weight. I’ve told myself the same kinds of things “I’m a whale.” “I look like a fat slob.” This is NOT helpful. It can become all-consuming. When you’re obsessing, it makes you unhappy. You are engaged! Be happy.

I’m not going to tell you not to lose weight, because in the end what is most important is for you to be happy and comfortable with yourself. Remind yourself that weight loss happens slowly. Being patient is hard when there are all these promised quick fixes and gimicks on the market. A good rule of thumb is – if it comes off quickly, it will come back even more quickly. I cannot stress enough how important it is to be patient. Relax. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t let a diet decrease your enjoyment of life (I know we’ve all been there). I once googled a Victoria’s Secret model’s diet, and even they are allowed to splurge on weekends because their dietitians recognize that constant vigilance and self-denial is a recipe for disaster.

As for foods? Think little changes. Avoid breads and carbs. These pack on weight like crazy because they’re easy energy and your body just burns them instead of fat. And again, don’t kill yourself trying to follow this rule. Yes, I still eat burgers with the bun, but i avoid pancakes, waffles, and biscuits. 

Look at the ingredient list in foods. Sometimes it’s not so much what you’re eating so much as what’s in it. Even people who eat the so-called healthy foods can be overweight because of all the chemicals and over-processed junk in there. That list can be scary! My mother always told me (and now scientist are starting to prove her right) that high-fructose corn syrup is the reason we’re all so overweight. It’s pretty much a completely fabricated super-sugar, and because of that our bodies just don’t know how to process it. I started reading labels and avoiding (or only eating in moderation, because it’s pretty much impossible to avoid completely. it’s in freaking everything) foods that contain it, and I started slimming down. As I move farther along in my new way of thinking, I find that I’ve begun to not like food that I don’t know where it came from or what’s in it. If the ingredient list has a bunch of things I can’t pronounce, it grosses me out. 

Which leads me to cooking. It is surprisingly fun! You like food, so you may already know this, but I come from a single-mother home of frozen food. Cooking only happens on holidays that require a family dinner. Cooking is cheaper than eating out, and fish in particular is crazy good for you. There’s a halibut with watermelon salsa recipe I’ve been dying to try, and a tilapia with tomato-olive sauce one that was delicious! Rachel Ray’s Autumn beef stew is also oh-so-good.

Umm. About exercise. I fucking hate that stuff. Sometimes I lift weights, but I’d rather lift a book any day. It’s good for you, yes. I just do it in small doses. Extremely small, since I still can’t stick to an exercise regime. I tried jumping rope today for cardio and was a miserable failure. I hated every second of it, and realizing how bad I was (and how out of shape), set a goal of a minute. It was so hard. Ugh. i HATED it. But I still felt like a champ after that puny one minute. Set a simple goal that you can achieve daily, whether it be taking flights of stairs at the mall instead of the escalator, and then set a bigger goal. You may fail on occasion, but you’ll get there eventually. 

You don’t need to do all of this all at once, so don’t kill yourself trying to make these die-hard rules. Perseverance is the MOST important aspect of any of this. It doesn’t matter if you break a rule on occasion, so long as you don’t give up totally.

At the end of the day, remember this: you have a man who thinks you are breathtakingly beautiful and loves and adores every inch of you. i will never forget when, as I was getting ready for bed, I frowned down at my tummy (20 lbs bigger than it had been thanks to a new job at a bbq restaurant with 1200 calorie meals) and complained that I was getting fluffy and how I needed to lose weight. I’m sure i sounded pretty forlorn, having gained back 20 of the 40 lbs I had just lost a few months prior. My guy just looked me with a blank and confused expression, shook his head, then shrugged and said, “I think you’re perfect.” Then he pulled me in to cuddle, and his hand rested on that stomach that I though was just so disgusting. He didn’t care one iota. Later, after we made love, he kissed the tummy I had earlier squeezed and looked at in dismay.



Rose (heaviest weight, 170-180 lbs not entirely certain; current weight, 141; goal weight, 115-125, depending on how I look when I get there)

Post # 14
1270 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 1994

Awe, don’t worry! Beautiful homes in all shapes! I have to remind myself of this. I would like to lose 25-30 pounds. And OMG do I love food. And since I live with chronic pain I have a hard time getting activity in the way I used to, it seems to be easy for me to gain weight. I gained 15 pounds (back) this year. Do I think I’m perfect? No. But I am trying to accept myself for who I am, right at this moment. I strive to accept myself, yet always try and improve. Right now I am trying to figure out a good plan to manage my food intake, and I am trying to get back into a sport I enjoy (rock climbing). Hugs!

Post # 15
473 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

You look gorgeous and I love that cardigan – I think you know how to dress for your shape. I think that you and your fiance make such a cute couple! You both look radiant and happy.

Post # 16
4645 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t see a whale, I see a beautiful woman. It makes me sad you see this when you look at these lovely photos.

@CreatureFromTheBlackLagoon:  What the?

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