Post # 1
I really didnt want a huge wedding party. and We so far have 6 bridesmaids, and 6 groomsmans. But now my FH decided to ask his father inlaw to be his best friend. First of all everyone i tell this to thinks it wierd. i think its really sweet. because he does have some guy friends who are worse then girls and would get jealous if he asked one over the other. but this now the point of the post. MY dilema is… i really dont want to add a 7th bridesmaid. i was trying to figure out a way around this. but my FH is insisting that i do. i know who im going to ask. but i would like to keep it to my 6. do you have any ideas how a way around this. My FH is more worried about his father having to walk by himself. but i figured he could walk down the aisle, with his son and wife. that way he is already up there when the ceremony starts. then i also thought maybe having one brides maid walk up w/ the children in the wedding. does anyone have any ideas or thoughts.????
Post # 3
I’m same as you…I have 6 bridesmaids and honestly I wish I had waited to ask (it was kind of impulsive right after we got engaged I called my girlfriends freaking out and asked them), but I didn’t, so I have a large bridal party. My FI has 7 groomsmen but I just don’t want anymore so I’m not going to. I think it’s ok to have uneven #s and like you said, he could be escorted by 2 people down the aisle, or another bridesmaid could be escorted with 2 groomsmen maybe?
Post # 4
TBH i already think 6 is over the top so i definatly wouldnt add any more
another way to see it – normal table seats 6 to ten people. your bridal table is possibly having 16 people.
Post # 5
I had 6 bridesmaids, and at some point in the planning, it just got to be too much. And on the day of the wedding, it was just a lot of sitting around for some of them.
All that being said, it was really great to have all of my best friends there with me when I got ready. So, it’s a tough call. I probably wouldn’t go over 6.
Post # 6
Six is a lot of people. If you have anyone else meaningful in your life you want standing up with you when you get married, do it. Otherwise tell your FI you’d prefer to keep the six you have. Numbers don’t have to match, and I doubt anyone will notice with such a large bridal party.
Post # 7
i have 7 and i think it’s fine. i was always anti large BPs but when it came down to it, these people are all REALLY close to me. i also know that a few of them will not be helpful with planning at all (newborn twins/lives out of state/eternally broke) so really as far as BP “tasks” go, i have 3 maybe 4… i hope that on the wedding day everyone is just sitting around relaxing!
if you dont want to add an extra person because no one is really that important to you, thats totally fine, you can be uneven…. no one will care! if they do, they are awful anyway!
if you do feel close witht he 7th girl then i think its fine to have her! and i like the idea you had for her escorting the kids
Post # 8
Six is already a lot of people, and I am a big advocate of not having fillers for the sake of having filers. I was a BM last year and was escorted by two groomsmen when we left because there was an uneven number. Chance you can do that?
Also, if your FH didn’t consult you on adding a 7th girl, then I don’t think he can now demand that you do. It was his choice to include his father (or father in law? which you be your father?) in the party, and if having an escort for him was a dealbreaker, he should have thought of that beforehand.
Post # 9
I had 8. I have a close knit group of childhood friends and a close knit group of college friends and 2 sisters-in-law. The only time I saw it cause an issue was when it came to Bridesmaid’s gifts! We also had an uneven number which really didn’t matter in the end. We realized that trying to come up with people to match my 8 was ridiculous.
At the end of the day, have who is closest to you. If it’s 2, great. If it’s 6, fine. Never let the numbers on the other side force you to pick someone you wouldn’t normally have, especially for something as simple as the recessional.
Post # 10
I can totally relate. I have 8 for sure with a possible 9th. I know it is a lot, but they are a core group of family and friends. You only get married once, have the people who you see being long term friends…and not just someone who is around for just a bit.
Post # 11
We have not asked the 7th person. but my FH feels that he doesnt want his dad walking by himself… i just feel its a little awkward to have him in the party in the first place. But i dont want to deny my FI that. but i feel i should have to add another bridesmaid to make it even. I figured i could have him walk up there w/ my FH, at the begging of the ceremony. and on the way back, have his sister walk w/ the kids, or one of the groomsman have to girls on his arms… but either. i dont want to add a 7th. the 7th person is my fh cousin, who he is close w/, and i considerbly close w. her too.. but not enough to ask her to be one of my bridesmaid. its just how i feel.
Post # 12
I was in a wedding that was supposed to have 8 BMs and 8 GMs, but the day before, one of the BMs had to be in the hospital b/c of pregnancy complications (she’s fine and has a healthy baby now!) The best man just stood on the altar with the groom while the rest of us walked up in pairs, and it was totally fine. For the recessional, the best man took the flower girl’s hand and walked out with her, which was ADORABLE!
Post # 13
Uh, wouldn’t his FIL be your dad? Why would he want your dad to be a groomsman? That doesn’t even make sense.
Post # 14
@hammerpants: not my father… his father, My Fiances Father is his best man
Post # 15
@likelimeade: i want him to do that, i want his father to be up there with when, and then have him or one of the bridesmaids walk down w/ the flower girl and ring bearers.
Post # 16
OP, you can’t shrink those already asked without really upseting people, but stand firm and don’t ask someone new just for the sake of numbers. That isn’t nice to that gal, and it’s not necessary.
@pengoala: My gal pals still came by while I was getting ready (my 3 maids were relatives). 🙂 I invited them and my family to visit, it’s just a mini-tradition in my family.
Now I didn’t really mean to invite my MIL, but she sort of thought she was invited and came by too and saw me beforehand getting ready and stayed for a little bit and I didn’t really have the heart to kick her out even though I wanted it just my side.