(Closed) Feeling like you’re going to get dumped all the time?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

LOL. That’s funny. I have to disagree though. My Fiance and I have had a really strong committment since we began dating and I never worried about us breaking up. And I guess I know too many people who break off engagments and get divorced to see an engagement as a way to ensure not breaking up.

Post # 5
Member
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m not gonna lie, there is an added level of security now that we are engaged. 

Post # 6
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

Fiance practically views us as married now. I was trying to explain to him why the ceremony was more important than the reception, since we’ll be pledging to spend our lives together. His response was that I had promised to marry him when I accepted his proposal, so I had basically already married him. Oh, Fiance, your mind works in mysterious ways.

So, lol, I guess he feels differently. I never felt like I was going to get dumped all the time, but I do feel slightly more secure, in a ‘cozy blanket’ way, not in an ‘I’m not going to get kicked to the curb’ kind of way, if that makes any sense.

Post # 7
Member
4693 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I can’t say I feel like I’m going to get dumped all the time, but I’m sure I’ll feel like we’re more committed after we get engaged!

Post # 9
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Even when I was just dating FH, I never felt like I was going to get dumped. The only time I ever felt that way was when I was being abused (in a past relationship). I think if you don’t feel secure in your relationship, that’s that–and it’s kind of a red flag. There’s a little added security (just a tiny, tiny bit) now that we’re engaged, but things aren’t really all that different.

Post # 10
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think there was once toward the beginning of the relationship we went through a rough patch but since then I never felt like I was going to get dumped really.  The engagement seemed to just add a ring and a wedding to plan but I’ve felt like we’ve been married for a while now, pretty much since we moved in together so it isn’t really different besides knowing it’ll be set in stone completely (which still doesn’t feel really different).

Post # 12
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@happyb: I think it’s more like the warm fuzzies than any real security, lol. Your friend sounds hilarious, though. 🙂

Post # 13
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@happyb: I didn’t mean to imply that–just saying that in my experience, it’s not a good sign to feel like you’re going to get dumped all the time. Lol!

Post # 14
Member
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I don’t get this really. I don’t think you should go from feeling like you could get dumped any moment (a sign of a troubled relationship, obviously) to getting engaged. I’ve been with bf for 4 years, and I never feel as if I am going to be dumped. If I did, I don’t think the answer to it would be getting engaged. It’s just as easy to break off an engagement as it is to break up with someone. The only difference is you might have a more financial stake, since the ring was bought and you may or may not have paid for things wedding related. But I sincerely doubt that is going to prevent someone who wants to break an engagement from doing so even if it means losing out on money. 

The topic ‘Feeling like you’re going to get dumped all the time?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors