Post # 1
Hi Bees. I’m fairly new here, but tonite I just feel so lonely planning this wedding alone.
My finace and I moved from Pittsburgh to Isle of Palms, SC recently. While the weather and sceneery is so great and beautiful – I miss my friends.
Our wedding is going to be small…only around 50 people. We are getting married in Holden Beach, NC (my mom has an intercoastal estate there…it’s huge/beautiful), so we are having the ceremony on the beach and the reception at her place. It’s just going to be our very closest friends (about 10), and the rest will be close family.
So it would appear I don’t have all THAT much to do, right? But I do. And I have to do it myself. My fiance is great and supportive and wonderful…but we own and business together out of our home and we are both very busy. I feel bad bothering him with things that seem so trivial right now…and his answer is all the same “whatever you want, babe.” He’s so laid back about everything! I wish I was more like that!
Me being a graphic designer/web developer, my creative side gets the better of me. I want to be doing these minute details on everything and it’s literally keeping me up at night. My head is swimming all night with all of these ideas.
I had to go dress shopping alone. I’m in craft stores alone, searching for centerpiece ideas and reception details. I feel like a huge loser! Today I saw 3 girls all giggling and laughing while picking out bachelorette stuff and it just made me miss my friends so much. I don’t have any friends down here at all since we live/work from home. We never do much (besides exercise together).
Is anyone else going it alone? I’m just feeling down and out. Not to mention I just had all 4 of my wisdom teeth out and I’ve been in pain/painpill heaven for the past 2 weeks.
I dunno…I guess I just need some cheer?
Post # 3
You can do it and its going to be great! I am also planning alone, my Fiance is preparing himself for boot camp and is working to save up for when he is gone. I don’t have any friends or family here really so I am going at it alone. If you ever need anyone to talk to or anything i’m on here regularly and you can PM me if you want. Good luck I hope you feel better about it all =)
I had my wisdom teeth surgically removed almost 3 months ago and I JUST got the feeling back in a section of my lip!
Post # 4
Sorry to hear that it’s getting you down. Are you having bridesmaids? Or even if not, have you kept in touch with your good friends back home? My maids are spread across the country, so I created a private facebook group so I can share photos of possible dresses, ideas for decor/flowers/etc so that I can get their opinions, etc. Would that help you feel a bit more connected?
Also, try to set ‘wedding planning times’ and then ‘dead times’ where you just don’t plan. That may help to keep it from being so overwhelming. And if you’d like your fiance’s input, try explaining to him that you really appreciate him being so willing to let you do what you love, but you’d really value his opinion or at least if he’d tell you if he prefers x over y, etc. Feel better with the wisdom teeth, those can be brutal. Things will take an upswing, I promise, just try to focus on the positive. Best of luck, @ijustrockout:.
Post # 5
@cyndistar3: thank you so much. i really do appreciate it! i don’t know how you can cope with your finace being gone, that must be so sad 🙁 BUT – i am so thankful for men like him for serving our country! i’m sure it won’t be easy on either of you!
i’m planning a vintage style wedding. i love anything retro, from depression era to the 60’s. i’m not going full-out with the retro-ness, just basically adding those details into the reception. i got most of my invitation suite designed and have an appointment at a local printing press monday to talk about the printing. (i’m terrible OCD with these things).
and OMGOSH! it’s so good to know that your lip sensation came back. the whole right side of my tongue is numb since my surgery! wth. it’s been 2 weeks to the date and i just feel like it’s never going to come back! although the lip nerve and tongue nerve are different, it gives me hope 🙂
thanks again for replying. i’m sure i will be taking you up on your offer 😉
Post # 6
@indibee: those are some great ideas. i am only having my best gf stand by me for the wedding, and my fiance is having his best. i’m not even insisting on a dress for her, just wahtever she feels comfortable wearing (she has great style).
i like the planning/dead times. i will have to force myself to abide by that! i do feel terribly overwhelmed…which is why my insomnia is so bad. with this surgery, the pain has made it hard to sleep properly as well. i have already lost 7 lbs, which is bad for me because i am only 5’7 and 117 lbs as it stands.
i will definitely take your good advice. thanks again!
Post # 7
@ijustrockout: Hey girl you are not alone! Actually i used to live in Charleston and miss it soooooo much! its such an awesome town and i promise you will love it! I moved from Charleston to Dallas for a job and thats where i met my fiance! things happen for a reason! we then moved to Chicago about 8 weeks ago so he could take a job… booooo………. i have moved all over the country and this has been one the hardest moves ever! i left my bridesmaids in Dallas, my family is from western NY state and i am pretty much alone! again… craft stores alone, planning alone, about to get dress altered alone, i am gonna have to take pics so someone can figure out the bustle! arggggg!! i know things are rough and i feel it everyday! but its nice to have this site and my friends ( even though by phone) have been nothing but supportive! atleast you are not at 9 degrees cold! you have an ocean! lol if you need suggestions for fun things to do or just to talk about the area, message me! i would be happy to help and make you feel not quite so alone! i am in your shoes!
Post # 8
@kimberlysnyder08: aw that’s so nice of you! i do love this area. we live right on the beach in IOP. it’s absolutely gorgeous. heaven compared to being up north in those bitter cold winters! arrrgghhh!
it’s glad to know i am not alone in this anyways. everyone here has been so nice!
i would like to get more involved in the Chucktown area.would love to meet some (decent) people and have friends again. i just loathe the bar scene (though i did find a pittsburgh steeler bar on sullivan’s island! yessss!)
thanks again for the encouragement. it really hit the spot.
Post # 9
@ijustrockout: those sound like some great ideas! I love the retro feel as well. Also I had a friend who had hers removed and the left side of her tongue was numb for about a year! That was quite a while ago though, for me they brought me back once a month until it was better. they probably would have stepped in before that long!
Post # 10
@cyndistar3: i swear if it’s numb for a year i am going to freak out! kissing is the weirdest thing ever now. it kinda grosses me out now tht my tongue feels like some huge, weird entity in my mouth…ughhhh!
Post # 11
@ijustrockout: they will most likely do something about it way before a year! that was how long it took hers to completely heal on its own and it was a pretty extreme case. And it was the most awkward thing to kiss when I couldn’t feel half of my lower lip LOL and it still tingles a bit so it is super sensitive and when Fiance kisses me it tickles haha
Post # 12
You’re definitely not the only one. I’m going it alone too… My closest friends/family are 700 miles away, and my best friend will be across an ocean for the last year before my wedding.
I grew up in NJ, so my family and most of my friends are there. I have been living in Santa Fe, NM for the last 7 years so all my recent/college friends are there. I made the HUGE decision about 2 months ago to move to Knoxville, TN to live with my fiance and his kids and plan our Tennessee wedding.
I know nobody here, except for my fiance. I have been going to bridal events by myself and have been really enjoying myself, but I think it will fade soon. My mom and best friend are coming down from NJ in the next few months for dress shopping but they are both busy so it will only be a weekend.
Not to mention my fiance’s ex-wife still lives here in town and is an unwelcome presence in my/our life… and I’m trying to adjust to being a stepmom to a 16 year old and a 3 year old (and I’m only 25!)… blah blah blah!!
So in other words… You’re not the only one. Hang in there. We can doooo eeeet!
Post # 13
Most of my friends are here in town w/ me, but I hate to drag them through everything so I feel like I’m doing most of my stuff alone.
Also I feel like no except me really gets my style and I don’t want everyone picking my things for me.
So I guess in a way I choose to do it alone, but it would be nice not to do it alone.