Feeling overwhelmed before my wedding on Saturday

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee

Big hugs Bee! Take a deep breath. I feel how your feeling.  I was kinda freaking out about wedding tasks so I actually called a counsellor tonight myself and she helped me relax and put things in perspective. Your therapy session is a perfect idea. This is normal for a few loose ends to need to be tied up or just not done at all. Most likely no one will even notice.

Some things I think you can forget. #1. Cleaning the house. Tell your mom she can hire a cleaner and you’ll pay (so not your responsibility but might be worth it to you) or just forget about cleaning it all together. 

#2: 4 gifts. Can you pick up gift cards or send/mail them after? 

#3: can you delegate someone else to pick up dress for you? 

Hope everything goes smoothly for you. ♡ 

 

Post # 3
Member
3266 posts
Sugar bee

Amazon has a great cleaning service.

Order the gifts on Amazon to be delivered. They also wrap.

Leave the welcome bags for last in case you run out of time; they are the least important items.

Have your coordinator call the venue re: last minute details.

Hell, have them finish the timeline too.

Delegate someone or hire a courier to pick up the dress.

Make the meeting with the DJ a call instead. 

Post # 4
Member
1415 posts
Bumble bee

Your fiance can take over with delivering welcome bags and organizing what needs to go to the venue on Friday.

Forget cleaning your mom’s house. Not a priority.

Combine picking up your dress and your license for one fewer trip.

Amazon the 4 gifts with same/next day delivery and wrapped (the wrapping is really nice).

Use making  the schedule for the coordinator as a way to organize the detals you need to confirm with the venue and the bridal party schedule. This combines 3 tasks in one.

Breath. Everything will turn out. And even if it doesn’t, you’re getting married and everyone there loves you. If things don’t work out, no one is going to judge. Everyone at your wedding just wants to support you. So don’t sweat the details.

Post # 6
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

I was so there OP. In the week leading up to my wedding I was so stressed I made myself physically ill. Like, shivering, achy, gastro (won’t tell you more details than that!) ill. And every time someone tried to help by making suggestions as PPs just did above for making things easier, I did exactly what you just did – I made an excuse for why this stressful thing was going to happen/had to be handled by me/whatever… there was nothing that could be said to calm me haha. I just would not accept any solutions.

What helped a lot was the people starting to arrive. It sounds like you’re right on the cusp of this now. Once my family and friends started popping into town I was reminded of why we were doing this and how lucky I was to have all these people who loved me. The wedding day was still long. There were still a million things to do. But everything seemed much lighter. And the wedding day, while exhausting, was everything I ever dreamed and more.

I know it’s hard to hear now bee, but there IS a light at the end of this tunnel. Let yourself let go of the little things. You’re about to marry the love of your life! Congratulations!

Post # 7
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

honeybee69 :  So sorry you’re going through this stress!  It sounds like you have to just power through it until your SIL/coordinator gets in tomorrow, so I’ll focus my advice on that, but if you can AT ALL delegate some of this stuff to other people OR downsize a priority or take it off the list entirely, then I definitely recommend that.

But if it fits in the category of it HAS to get done, and you’re the best/only person to do it, then here’s what I recommend:

1. Breathe.  Seriously.  Sit down for a minute every couple hours (starting now), and do a breathing exercise. Inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 8.  Do a few repetitions.  Your brain needs all the oxygen and calm it can get!

2. Make a physical list with all the steps of things that need to get done. When you finish each step (so it helps if you break each bigger task into smaller ones!), cross it off the list with gusto.  The positive reinforcement will help.

3. DON’T CHUG COFFEE!  Drink your normal amount, but what you really need to up is your water intake.  I promise this will help you more with staying alert and on your A Game than caffeine will.

 

We’re all rooting for you!!!  Remember, at the end of the day, all that matters is that you get married to your fiancé.  Everything else is extra icing on top 🙂  

You can do it!!

Post # 8
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2019

PS: DO get some sleep!  And if you feel like you need a cat nap of 20-30 minutes during the day, take it! It will help you stay sharp the rest of the time and work more efficiently.

Post # 9
Member
5534 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

I really don’t think cutting out helping your mom clean as other posters have suggested is fair, when she is hosting you and several of your guests for your wedding. 

I get that your stressed but you need to keep yourself in check, being mean and short to people who are only trying to help you is just rude.  

Your fiance is there to help too so it really won’t be too bad.  Order the gifts online and pay for next day delivery for one, don’t make jobs more complicated than they need to be.  Your fiance can drop the bags off to the hotel and help your mom clean while you get your hair done.

When you get stressed about something really just consider if it needs to be done.  Don’t do tasks for the sake of it, you are the one that will suffer eg. can’t you just call the DJ instead of meeting in person?

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