(Closed) feeling pressure to get thank you’s out

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Well personally I’d rather get a Thank you a little late then none at all. I attended 3 weddings last summer and only got 1 thank you note. The one we did get didn’t even have a note from the bride and groom,just thank you printed on the bottom of their picture. I always think it’s nice to hand write a little note so it shows that you put a little thought and effort into it. We wrote 75 thank you notes for gifts that we recieved at our housewarming party, yeah it took a little while but it was the proper thing to do.

Post # 5
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018 - The Grand Old House, Grand Cayman

I would DEFINITELY rather get a fun, postcard-style thank you with an actual picture from the wedding than a generic thank you note.  And if it came later, I would not mind AT ALL.  I am STILL sending thank yous out and our wedding was 2 months ago!  Our friends and family know we had the wedding, graduation, moving, and studying for the bar so I’m sure people are fine with it.  At this point I’m sending thank yous out for gifts received after the wedding, so that’s not so bad, right? 🙂

Post # 6
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

I sent my thank-yous out around 1.5 months after the wedding. I thought I was totally on the ball! If you’re feeling the pressure and there’s no photographer pics in sight, maybe you could use a non-professional photo of you two from the wedding as part of your thank-you note?

Also, not everyone’s thank you has to be the same. You could write the thank-yous your grandmother is nagging you about right now to appease her, and send the rest of the photo thank-yous later. That would be double postage for only a few people, right?

Post # 7
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I feel pressure to get my thank yous out too for the same reasons but I tell myself that photo cards are very common these days and anyone with a professional photographer will have waited around a month (or more!) for their photos, so I can’t possibly be off-base with my timeline.  I think thank-you’s in general should be prompt, but in the case of a wedding I think people would rather a card with a nice photo from the day. 

Post # 8
3331 posts
Sugar bee

OMG, Ladybug, my mom asked me A WEEK after the wedding if our thank you notes were finished!  We had been on our honeymoon and hadn’t even finished opening our gifts yet!  Our wedding was a month ago and we’re about half way done with our notes.  I figure, as long as people get them soon, it’s no biggie. 

Post # 9
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’d send thank-you notes to your grandparents’ friends using plain old notecards, and then send photo cards to everyone else. Your grandparents’ friends won’t mind missing the photo cards — in fact, they probably won’t be used to them and would be happier with just a plain notecard. Plus, they want to know if their gifts arrived, which is a legitimate concern given all of the registry horror stories I’ve heard over the years. But it’s your call.

Post # 10
1718 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2008 - Winery in the Gold Country

I think picture thank yous are so cute, and I really enjoy them!!! I’d rather get a picture thank you late than a paper thank you right on time.

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