(Closed) Feeling Resentful Today

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 20
Member
726 posts
Busy bee

@Legallyblondiebride:  It’s hard not to be there for a friend even when they are never there for you. One sided friendships are too hard to maintain. You do all the work, which builds up resentment, while the other person goes on with their selfish ways.

You need to do what is best for you. If you are feeling resentment, it will build up until it explodes. It will be in your best interest to bow out. I hate one sided friendships. I had one and while it was hard to completely remove that person from my life, I feel much better and less stressed. 🙂

Post # 22
Member
2670 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

@Button:  That was me who yes, quoted Oprah on here the other day, lol!

I think you need to decide if you can let all the resentment from your wedding go and continue the friendship or decide it is not worth the effort. If you can’t let everything go, I would bow out.

Post # 23
Member
1733 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’m not sure I want to continue the friendship. She was so awful to me during my engagement, but now that it is “all about her” she is fine.

If that’s how you truly feel there’s no reason to stand up in her wedding party.

Post # 24
Member
1180 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 1993

@ieatunicorns:  I’m in the UK, so we don’t have Oprah here! It’s a really, really good quote though!

View original reply
@Legallyblondiebride:  I think if bowing out would make you relieved then you have your answer. Come on, you’re a newlywed! It’s supposed to be all relaxation and stress-free at the moment! Also, you have to do a recap. It’s Bee law.

 

Post # 25
Member
2623 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Given what you said it makes this situation even easier, I really don’t understand why either of you have each other as bridesmaid when clearly you haven’t been good friends. Bow out of the wedding, or if you dont’ want to cause a scence be upfront about what you will do so she clear on what to expect from you. Then let the relationship go as it clealry hasn’t been a friendship in a while. Sometimes friendships just fade for whatever reason.

Post # 27
Member
1098 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Legallyblondiebride:  Yes do a brief recap. Show your favorite photo of you and DH from the wedding.

I can’t talk though..I never did a recap eitherEmbarassed

Post # 29
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Ugh. I feel this entry completely.

Sorry it had to go down like this. Big events tend to show people’s true colors and ability and desire to properly maintain friendships.

She didn’t do the legwork and I don’t think I would go all out for her either. I wouldn’t make it obvious and would still “help” but not go above and beyond. 

Post # 30
Member
9168 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you want to help her, then help her if not then don’t.  I just wouldn’t base your decision to help her on her lack of helping you.

Post # 31
Member
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Wouldn’t deal with it, bow out. 

The topic ‘Feeling Resentful Today’ is closed to new replies.

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