(Closed) Feeling resentful towards a groomsman. vent/rant

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Yikes!  I would be frustrated as well.  It sounds like they are not realizing that you guys have a ton of bills to pay and things to finalize for the wedding and they are thinking your a little better off than you are right now. I think until you plan a wedding you have no idea how much work, time and money really goes into that one day. I would try to let it go but let them know that if they want free wood, they can drive over to you and get it.

Post # 5
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That is so frustrating! Some people really have nerve, I mean to call you twice a week for wood is crossing the line I think. Especially after you have already done so much for them! Not to mention that gas prices here are ridiculous! I’m sorry that your Fiance got hurt, you don’t need that additional stress. Good Luck!

But I am excited for your wedding and to see another Maine Bride! Where are you getting married?

Post # 6
Member
3082 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would stop helping them and no longer give them any wood. If they can afford a new car/electronics then they should be able to pay for the wood to heat their house. 

Post # 7
Member
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m not having a good feeling about this. I understand things are tight for your friends but to me it looks like they’ve taken your generosity to pay for the dress and tux and thought they’d take some more. Honestly I don’t know if I could count on them showing up for the wedding. He can’t drive 15 min for a fitting, they have zero interest in the wedding and is they’re strapped for cash I can see them saying they don’t have $$ for gas to drive to the wedding. I don’t trust them. I don’t know if you’d consider replacing them but if not you’re running the chance of them backing out. Anyone who has balls enough to call you saying “When are you bring more wood?” (like you’re responsible for that, you have time and $$ for gas) has the balls to say “Hey man, I don’t think we can be in your wedding, can’t afford it. Sorry”

Post # 8
Member
504 posts
Busy bee

@FoxyBride14:  I’m not trying to be rude but if it’s not important to them to be in your wedding maybe you shouldnt include them. You shouldnt have to practically beg someone to be involved. The people that love you want to see you happy and want to be a part of that.

As far as the rest goes, and I didnt learn this until myt 30’s. Say NO

Post # 9
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I sounds like you guys shouldn’t talk to them about the wedding anymore. It doesn’t sound like they’re interested. Is there any way to get your money back on the tux? Maybe they feel like there’s too much wedding pressure. Either way, they aren’t measuring up. I think the only way to salvage the relationship is to talk to them as friends and not as part of your wedding party. 

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