(Closed) Feeling so alone…

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Ms. Vanilla Bean:  Where is your Fiance in all of this? I talk to him most about wedding stuff. I understand the dress part would be difficult but everything else would probably be a mutual decision.

Post # 4
Member
237 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Does your Fiance have an aunt or sister-in-law who might be thrilled if you asked her to step up and give you some major planning support?

Post # 5
Member
1414 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Yep…I hear you….I am in the same boat.

Post # 7
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m sorry you’re going through this.  *hugs* I know it doesn’t help your situation but I am going through the same emotions, too.  

Post # 8
Member
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think you should write a letter to your aunts asking if they could accompany you to some of your vendor appointments. You can do some things with one and others with the other. It shouldn’t have to be all or nothing. This especially important if they are your mothers sisters as it will help you feel close to her. You may be surprised that they will step up for you especially if you tell them how much you are missing your mom. Reach out!

Post # 9
Member
1576 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Aw honey, i do know what you are going through. My parents are deceased as well and no one is helping me with planning. Weddingbee to the rescue! WE are here!

Post # 10
Member
1414 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Vanilla bean–how are you feeling today?

Feel free to pm me anytime!

(My parents are deceased as well…and the wedding planning has brought up so much sadness.)

Hugs to you

Post # 11
Member
4327 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@bricon:  I agree. There is no reason you shouldn’t welcome your family when they have generously offered their help, especially since it’s potentially a relationship you’ve been craving. Their problems are their problems. You could offer full disclosure to each that you are accepting help from the other one, but it should in no way influence the relationship you have with the opposite aunt, because their problems are none of your concern. Really, it isn’t. They should be mature enough to realize that their feud is contained amongst themselves.

Post # 12
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I am so sorry to the ladies that lost their parents.  My dad is termilly ill with cancer, and we are going to loose him this year I am pretty sure.  2012 will be filled with highs and lows.

I have done most wedding stuff alone.  I went dress hopping alone, I’ve done the bulk of the research alone (then I run the ideas by Fiance so he has a smaller selection to help make a decision).  My sisters are not near me, my friends are not near me.  A bachelorette party and bridal shower are just out of the question due to no one being close to me – geographically speaking.

And now we are going to elope so it’s more just us two.  But alas there are bright sides to it!  Perhaps you just need to find your PROs list like I have and refer to it often.

 

Hugs to you!!!!

Post # 13
Member
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I wrote a similar venting post.  I hear ya.  I have both of my parents (future in laws are out of the country and arrive 3 days before the wedding).  My fiance and I are paying for everything – which is FINE, but I feel like there is some – I dont know what to call it – not animosity, but maybe just irritation – with my parents because they are not paying for it – i don’t know – it’s like just a basic lack of interest in the whole thing.  My fiance has also been a great help, and my bridesmaids have tried – it’s just some of them are on to other chapters of their lives – kids, etc. and another is engaged herself…. another lives out of state, etc.  So it feels like I don’t have anyone to bounce any ideas off of either.  So I totally get that.  That’s why I’ve been prowling the boards lately.  but yes – i know the feeling – i am excited to marry my fiance, but I’m totally over the whole wedding – almost to the point where I get anxiety when I think about it and when people ask me about it.  I think they expect me to just start gushing about how excited I am, but in reality, I’m kinda dreading it just because I want to get it over with.  So vent away – I totally get where you’re coming from – and I’m sorry that your mom isn’t here to help you – my mom IS here, but hasn’t been much help at all.  🙁 

Post # 14
Member
1015 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Awww – poor thing! I know it isn’t the same as someone physically being there, but you definitely have us for support!

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