Post # 1

Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
Seriously these past couple days have been the worst. I feel so disgusting. sad. unhappy. unworthy. ugh.
I’m always in pain so I never feel like working out. I have been seeing my chiropractor so its okay sometimes, and I know I need to get my body in motion Im just so afraid of making it worse.
I’m sure you already saw that I went to pick up my dress and the lady asked if I gained weight, which didnt help.
I look at my Fiance and think he deserves a skinnier wife (well fiance now) Someone pretty and healthy who he can show off. Its not like he’s ever given me a reason to think he is unhappy with me, but all I can think about is that sooner or later he will get tired of how I look. I am not sure why I am so paranoid and like I said, the past couple days the feeling has only intensified.
Sorry about venting on here but if I talk to Fiance I’m probably going to start crying. I almost already am, but I am holding it in as best I can.
I wish I could just sleep all the time. That way I dont have to eat, and I dont have to feel any of these stupid feelings.
MissKariAnne = whiner.
blah.
Post # 3

Member
2577 posts
Sugar bee
Hugs.
I think we can all be so hard on ourselves at times.
Your fiance is with you because he chose YOU and loves YOU.
Exercise is one of those things that is nasty to begin with (at least to me) and then becomes enjoyable, and you do not feel right unless you do it.
As for feeling ‘disgusting’ which I assure you, you are not.. taking steps to look after yourself and your body will only ease these negativities.
Be kind to yourself. You are unique, beautiful and precious.
Post # 4

Member
241 posts
Helper bee
Why are you always in pain? Do you have a back injury?
There isn’t anything you can do to work on your fitness? I only ask because working out always makes me feel better about myself!
What about yoga? You don’t have to spend a lot of money to do this. I bought a DVD at Walmart and I do it in the comfort of my own home. When I started the DVD I couldn’t even touch my toes without bending my knees! Now I can! 🙂
Could you and your Fiance take walks together? Or does that cause too much pain?
Also, you could look into water fitness classes at your local YMCA (if you have one). Water workouts are great for people with back or joint pain! I took a water aerobics class a few years ago when I was just starting out. It was fun! I was the youngest person there by about 40 years, but I felt comfortable there. None of the older ladies were judging me.
I’m sorry you’re feeling so down in the dumps. I only suggested so many activities because I have found that you have to first change your actions before you can change your thinking/feelings. I am not trying to minimize your feelings or ignore them! I’m trying to help!
It is an awesome thing that you Fiance loves you JUST the way you are – now you have to learn how to do that for yourself.
Post # 5

Member
270 posts
Helper bee
@misskarianne: I’m so sorry. I’ve had days where I feel disgusting too. (dieting and working out for 2 months, no weight loss but increase in waist measurement, which is always fun.) I’m sorry you feel like he deserves a skinnier wife, but your fiance loves you. What he deserves is a loving, HAPPY wife. I can guarantee he would rather have a happy wife than a skinny wife. Please don’t let how you feel about yourself get in the way of your relationship. You’re going through a rough time right now with the pain that makes it hard for you to work out. We all have days where we feel crappy. Don’t let it change who you are. =)
Post # 6

Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
Oh my goodness, hun. Double hugs. I am sure you aren’t the only one going through this, and it helps to be surrounded by a great support system that this place offers. So many brides that huddle together in one place. And we really don’t mind you venting at all. That is why the majority come to places like this.. Ideas and opinions, but most of all, for support. I am just really sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I am sure if you were to talk to your Fiance, that he would understand and at least give you the physical hug that you probably very much need right now. I may not be in your shoes completely, but sometimes I do wonder what my exact place is. And when I am, I realize that if he didn’t love me, he wouldn’t have ever asked me to move in with him, and we wouldn’t be headed on the path that we are on right now. He doesn’t just see the aesthetic side of loving you, and I am sure you are beautiful, love. Inside and out. He will see ALL of you, no matter if you are a 0 or a 28. No matter what your size, good or bad, right or wrong. I hope this helped.
Post # 7

Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
@yellowismyfavoritecolor: we aren’t sure what is wrong. I have been like this for 2 years now. We are basically just managing it at this point. I’ve seen 7 doctors (specialists included) and had lots of blood work and everything done. But nobody can figure it out. So I just do what I can to make it not hurt as much all the time. Some days are worse than others.
I know that working out will make me feel better, because it did last time I started working out. I started with water aerobics, and when I felt okay after that I moved on to walking on a treadmill, and certain weight machines. I could even do hip hop hustle (dance) and zumba.
I appreciate your feedback, I am working on getting back to the gym. I have a membership that includes all the classes and everything.
Post # 8

Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
The thing is, Im not normally like this. I am normally happy go lucky and I am just not sure what is going on right now.
My body is rebeling against me. I’m always so tired and sore.