Post # 1
I am 29 years old as is my fiance, we live in a small town near Toronto. I have a small law pratice and my fiance works a service job. We own a house here (a triplex), and everything is fairly steady.
My concern is that I feel like we are living the steady lives of 50 year olds rather than 20 year olds! I do not want kids anytime soon, I’ve tried to propose going back to Montreal, living out West), but fiance wants to stay put.
He keeps talking about opening his own restaurant as a reason for wanting to stay here, but I doubt that it will happen (he’s been talking about it for 4 years).
I am unsure if I should push the issue again (it’s always a fight), or just start travelling more for work for my source of adventure, am I being unreasonable? I know lots of people just want stability, but this is very stable and I am bored.
Post # 2
- Wedding: November 2019 - City, State
Is just traveling once or twice a year/taking a vacation an option for you guys? I don’t know why it has to be outright moving. FH and I travel quite a bit and that seems to scratch my itch, otherwise I would feel the same way I think.
Post # 3
jade31 : did you ever talk about moving away before you got married? You’re not unreasonable for wanting toove somewhere else but you are unreasonable if you know he doesn’t want to and you keep pushing it. Would happy long term if you never moved away? I think that’s something you really need to figure out.
Post # 4
Shouldnt you have discussed this before getting married? Thats kind of a big thing to just gloss over.
That said, if he isn’t willing to re-locate, travelling the world is going to be the next best option.
Post # 5
Not too much advice but wanted to let you know I empathize. My Darling Husband and I went to college for engineering (how we met) so due to having pretty good jobs, we seem to be on a faster track than our friends (school and car loans paid off at 23, moved out at 23, married and bought a house at 26 and it should be paid off in a few years). Our finances and lifestyle seem to be more in line with people that are 40+. We live in a small town in the Northeast. Darling Husband has a lot of roots here (all his family live within an 45 minute radius) so sometimes it makes me sad that I will likely live here the rest of my life. The best cure for that is traveling! A nice adventure once in a while makes me appreciate my simple rural small town life 🙂
Post # 6
eurasianbee : Yeah I think that’s what I’ll have to accept. And my fiance is open to travelling and retiring later in life, but he wants to be here closer to family.
I’ve got him out and travelling during our relationship, and I can travel for work so I will I think just have to accept that.
Post # 7
jade31 : seems that you are bored and unfulfilled. Try to find different ways to mitigate that.
can you travel for work, volunteer for something you are passionate about, travel with habitat for humanity, start a side gig?
one thing that helped me out is to realize you have over 40 more years to live (hopefully) and there is plenty of time to do all sorts of things like peace corps after kids are older, moves to the beach…