(Closed) Feeling underwhelmed :(

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@sammygal:  Relaxxxx. You still have a lot of time to plan. He probably is just wanting to celebrate the engagement first. My SO has been pretty hands off so far, unless I ask for his help or something. I think its generally assumed the bride does most of the wedding planning

Post # 5
7649 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@sammygal:  Congrats, first of all. Second, you have quite a long time to plan still. Third, men generally aren’t going to get excited nless it concerns them so to even go look at outfits, favors, venues, DJs–just no. It may not be his thing. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to marry you or that you aren’t important. It may just mean its not his type of thing or the wedding isn’t as important as the marriage.

Darling Husband was pretty hands off (meaning I picked everything out and gave him choices or asked if he liked this or that) until I got overwhelmed and gave him “the list” a few months out from the wedding. That’s when he started to help.

I would just try to enjoy the engagement right now. Start with your big stuff-venues, photogs, DJ- and then revisit the outfit suggest for him. He won’t need to order until about 6 weeks before the wedding typically anyway.

Post # 6
5660 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012


Now… Calm down lol. It’s been all of a week! Actually it’s pretty likely he WON’T eventually get interested in planning. Maybe a few aspects that are important to him but for MOST men, the little details of a wedding are boring.  If you want him to make sure he is involved in something and does something, eventually you can give him a job. My husbands main priority was to find and book the honeymoon and do all the research, as well as to come up with possible songs for the reception. The best people to share your excitement with, and all of your ideas right now is your girlfriends and your mom. Pinterest is your friend! And the bee πŸ™‚ 

Also 18 months is quite a stretch, to him it probably might as well be 5 years! you’ll also likely change your mind quite a few times sabout feel and what you ultimately want to do so no need for him to get involved enough to make decisions at this point.

Post # 7
105 posts
Blushing bee


I agree just enjoy being engaged instead of jumping right into wedding planning.FWIW I’m a little jealous that you got an unexpected proposal and your Fiance is fine with you doing ALL the planning lol

Post # 9
714 posts
Busy bee

@sammygal:  I just got engaged 6 days ago! My Fiance won’t even discuss a date yet!! I’m a little sad too! I always thought I’d like a couple of months to enjoy the engagemebt, but everyone’s asking me for a date! I don’t have one! At least you have a date!!

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