(Closed) Feelings about taking his last name

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 61
Member
771 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

 

Rachel631:  Well that was the original deal. I should have waited until he actually did it before I started changing things that only I could do, like for work. I hold an insurance license in pretty much every province and started changin my name with the ones where I just needed my marriage certificate before hubby helped with any of the other name change things. Well he never did really help with any of the paperwork, and the paperwork he did do I had to bug him repeatedly. And actually, that wasn’t even name change paperwork, it was just getting me added to the account we decided to share. If I had known that it wasn’t actually a big deal to him and that he wasn’t actually going to help I wouldn’t have done it and really regret changing my name.

Post # 62
Member
3584 posts
Sugar bee

 

serendipity24:  At first I was a bit hesitant to change my name and it took me almost a year to do it but now that its done I find it odd ot hear my old last name! I love my new las t name cause it is much shorter then my old one nd I like how my name looks better now ๐Ÿ™‚ It as a definite adjustment at first (espcially the new singnature part) but it has been the new one for about 3 months now and I’m getting used to it.

Post # 63
Member
4556 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’m so excited to have his last name! Even though I wish it wasn’t so damn common, and so does he.   

I’m an only child, and obviously a girl so my family name ends with me, BUT my first son’s first name will be my maiden name. 

Post # 64
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I also feel conflicted about taking his last name.  I’ve had my name my whole life and it just feels weird thinking that I’ll have a new name pretty soon.  On top of that, my maiden name basically dies out with me so that’s pretty sad too.  I thought about making my maiden name my middle name, but it sounds pretty ridiculous (think The Wedding Singer – Julia Gulia).  I’m taking FI’s last name though because I like the idea of us all having the same name, especially when we start having kids.

Post # 65
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I have a very common, strong last name and I’m VERY close with my dad. I do feel sad that I’m giving it up but I’m very excited for him to be my husband so it’s worth it. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 66
Member
409 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I’m excited to eventually change my name, but I went back and forth about it because I have published under my maiden name. So I came to a sort of compromise. Even after I marry, I’ll continue to write and publish under my maiden name (aka use it as a pen name). But for all legal purposes and social outings, I’ll go by Mrs. (His Name). SO is cool with this compromise too, so it’s all good.

Post # 67
Member
673 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Changing my name is pretty bitter sweet for me.  I’m excited to become a solid unit with Mr. S and share that name with our future kids, but I’m still sad to see my maiden name go.  I will have had it for 30 years and it’s dying off.  Plus, half the people I know (both coworkers/bosses and friends) address me by my last name.  I thought about keeping my maiden name as my middle name but those initials (which I use quite a bit at work) looks entirely too much like a very unfortunate acronym. 

Post # 68
Member
321 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I am not taking my FI’s last name. First of all it sounds stupid with my name…Allana Nayna. There’s no way. He’s mauritian, if anyone was wondering about the origin haha.

Second of all, the idea that a woman and children are ‘owned’ by a man offends me a little and I like my name. Our children will be taking his last name and I don’t mind at all if people refer to me as ‘Mrs Nayna’ socially or at work etc. but legally I am not changing it. ALSO I’m super lazy hahaha and can’t be bothered.

Post # 69
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I like my surname and it fits me and my identity better. Honestly I’m not looking forward to changing my surname to my SO’s, because I feel like I’d lose part of my identity. If in the end it will make him happier that I change my surname, then I’m going to turn my current surname into my middle name (I don’t have a middle name).

Post # 70
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee

View original reply
serendipity24:  I feel like I have some weird attachment to my maiden name, like I’m pretty sure I probably wont be taking FI’s last name.  Unless I hyphenate it, or something.  But I like my last name and kind of feel bad that my dad had all girls so no one to “carry on” the name, lol.

Post # 71
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

View original reply
Sunbeam-bride:  sunbeam! You are so lucky ๐Ÿ™‚ i would belooking forward to that name change, how cool

Post # 72
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

View original reply
futuremrste:  if it was me and i felt that unhappy, i would change it back. Id be so angry if i was you :/

Post # 73
Member
2134 posts
Buzzing bee

I am very happy to be taking his last name but I definitely have heaitations. I really wanted him to take my last name but he refuses. I wanted him to change his because my father bl passed away when I was a little girl. And so there is just me. My father only had sisters so they are already married or are in the process of getting married and are changing their last name. So this will literally be the end of my family name. Soo I’m kind of upset about that. I understand why he wants me to change my last name, and honestly I have always wanted too, but now that I’ve actually thought about it more and understand what it actually means I’m a little saddened by the thought.

Post # 74
Member
443 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

When we started talking about getting married, I planned to change my name. But as we got closer to the wedding date (and the prospect of losing/changing my name became more real) I’ve been leaning against it. I don’t have anything against his name, but I’ve had my name as my identity for 29 years. And as a feminist, I resent that I’m expected to do this (not by him, but by society/tradition). Thankfully he’s happy whatever I do.

I might go by Mrs. HisName socially but keep my maiden name legally/professionally. But I know that’d be confusing.

Post # 75
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I will not be changing my last name and in fact my fiance will be taking my last name ๐Ÿ™‚ He and I are very excited about it.

The topic ‘Feelings about taking his last name’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors