(Closed) FG and her mom at my bachelorette party!? Who is in the right?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
3968 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Fall_In_Love22:  I think bachelorettes should be adults only– at least 18+.

Post # 4
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think bachelorettes should be adults only and NOT include mothers, aunts or any other “motherly” type people AT ALL. It’s a last hurrah for you, your BMs and your closest gfs.

Post # 6
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Including a 6 year old in ANY bachelorette party activities is inappropriate, imo. There’s no reason for her to be there and considering you don’t want to include her, that should be enough. We didn’t have any young girls in our Bridal Party but my 3 younger male cousins were our ushers and Ring Bearer (aged 6, 13 & 14) and none of them were included in DH’s bachelor party. It’s one thing to invite the girl to the bridal shower but the bachelorette party is a completely different story. 

Post # 7
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@Fall_In_Love22:  I think you can invite whoever you want.  However, if its going to cause family sh*t if you don’t, you may want to suck it up and let them come to dinner. 

I kind of had to invite BIL’s Girlfriend to my bachelorette party (well my BMs did).  I don’t like her, she totally hates me.  SIL asked Brother-In-Law and he said we should invite her or it would cause more ‘issues’ between them (they have a pretty bad relationship).  I basically didn’t talk to her all night and she stayed away from me (so I don’t even know why she bothered coming) so it was fine.

Post # 8
Member
8438 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think Bahelorette parties are usually 18+ but I think that depends entirely onthe bride and the type of party. I think that most of the activities you are doing for your Bridal Party are entirely suitable for a younger person especially of they are around adults having a few drinks (not total booze blowout) at other times. I think it depends on what you want and how big an issue not inviting them would be.

Post # 9
Member
1358 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It would be completely inappropriate to have a little girl at your bachelorette party, low-key or not. Explain to your mom that your shower is for the women attending, but the bachelorette is about YOU. It’s not formal, I’m guessing there will probably be some drinking, and it would be both irresponsible and bizarre to include a child.

Enlist the help of your BM’s to explain what the normal ettiquette for a bachelorette party is if she won’t back down. Or just go rent a The Proposal and tell her to imagine a small child in the bachelorette party scene.

Post # 10
Member
1725 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t see any reason the Flower Girl should need to be at the Bach party

Post # 11
Member
2692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

It’s your bachelorette party… you should have who you want.  

Post # 12
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Fall_In_Love22:  I’m confused. In what way is a bachelorette party for kids? Would she be as adament about the ring bearer being at the bachelor party? Even if there aren’t strippers gyrating in  your faces (and for all she knows one of your bridesmaids has that up her sleeve) you are going to be having ADULT conversations and don’t need to watch yourselves because there is a 6yo there. This is ridiculous, it’s a bachelorette, not the shower.

Post # 13
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Inappropriate for the 6 yo to be there, but given you’ve invited all of the other family, I can see the pressure to have the aunt there too so she’s not left out.  That said, I would never have my mom/aunts there!  For me, it’s my generation – my friends, and the only relatives are the ‘maids (my sister, my cousin, SIL).

Post # 14
Member
9687 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Fall_In_Love22:  OP, I feel you’re in the right on this one.  I don’t think a bachelorette party is appropriate for a child, even if she is the Flower Girl and it’s only for dinner.  Hopefully your aunt will decline the invitation if your Mom persists. 

Post # 15
Member
7651 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

The aunt I would invtie to avoid drama, but the 6 year old shouldn’t be at a bachlorette party, even at a bridal shower (at least if it were my family–my mom doesn’t care what’s inappropriate for a bridal shower but that’s ok because she is super fun and funny lol).

If you do invite the aunt and 6 year old either one of two things will happen: Either everyone will censor themselves, which will make for boring conversation when the bach party should be hilarious and fun OR the aunt will get pissed at how inappropriate this all is and leave.

Yes to the aunt (although you don’t have to) and DEFINATELY no to the 6 year old.

Post # 16
Member
9687 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@megz06:  Good point!  How do you talk about certain intimate things they might want to discuss in front of a little kid?  I’d be ticked off, too.  A bachelorette should be fun and just a little raunchy, lol.  Kid will nix that in a heartbeat.

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