Post # 1
It’s been a week since we got engaged. Since I know that neither of us want a big wedding (we want just us and our parents) I’ve been looking at some beach elopment packages. FH is such a feet dragger and doesn’t understand timelines. We both want to start trying for a baby next year so we should get this show on the road. But he doesn’t want to talk about a wedding! He hasn’t said in so many words but if I mention anything he kinda tunes out. He told me last night that we will get around to talking about it, but I don’t think he understands that things take some time to put together so we can’t wait and just decide one day to get married the next week! I know I am rushing it a bit but I just want to get the gears in motion, ie dress shopping. It’s frustrating, but I know this is how he is. He procrastinates about everything. I’m a planner. how do I get him to want to talk about setting a date and getting some venue info with me? Anyone else have/had issues with FI not wanting to talk about the wedding? I know he wants to get married, I just also knew this would be an issue based on his feet dragging nature!!
Post # 2
My FI was like this at first, it took about 2-3 weeks after getting engaged for him to start looking with me. I think sometimes they put so much effort and time prepping for the proposal and teh idea of marriage that they want a bit of a break from wedding talk after haha. Have a browse yourself for the next week or two and get a guest list idea, budget idea and venue ideas etc and after 2 weeks show him everything and he should be much more willing to go through it. Once you start, he will realise how much hard work it is and that should kick him into action. For now he probably wants a little bit of time to enjoy being engaged.
Post # 3
I think you need to think about this from his perspective a bit more. You JUST got engaged and there was probably a lot of anticipation and planning which went into the proposal and engagement on his behalf. Let him take a break for at least a few weeks before you fully get into planning with him. I understand that you’re excited to get started and you’ve got other reasons to want to hurry things along, but two weeks won’t throw your whole timeline out.
Post # 4
Since it’s only been a week, enjoy being engaged before you jump right into wedding planning. It probably took him a while to get to the engagement, now it’s like you’re on to the next thing already. Yes you do have to plan in advance but you should also take time to enjoy this right now.
Post # 5
I know I’m being too anxious! It’s just hard cause I’m so excited ! And because mom calls me daily asking about dress shopping. But I agree, I’m going to shelve this until next month. I just always get nervous that if I wait I’m going to miss out on something. Thanks bees! Think I just needed to hear someone say hold your horses 🙂
Post # 6
yogahhh: Geez, it’s only been a week. Give both of you some time to let the engagement sink in. If you nag him about a timeline this early in the game he’s gonna get extremely pissed off at you and you may not have a wedding at all. Seriously, guys HATE to be bugged about wedding planning. Ask any Bee if their man is totally stoked about it. Most will answer “no”. If you’re gonna use having a baby next year as an excuse then you might as well get married at the courthouse. Very easy to plan quickly.
Post # 7
livhuss: spot on.
I totally get that rush you get when that rings slips on your finger! But, guys are different. He just cleared one hurdle, give him a hot second. If it makes you feel any better, it took us a year before we even set a date. To this day, FI is convinced we have an eternity before the wedding to get things done (10 months-ya right!) I think its pretty normal.