- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
I’m incredibly hurt after a late night fight with my FH. I’m left wondering whether the wedding that I’ve had a guy making decisions every step of the way was just him playing along, and whether I should call off the entire ceremony and reception (not wedding) now.
FH and I went to meet with one of our friends who will be officiating. He’s officiated several weddings before, even has a few greetings and other things written out he’ll be sending us.
FH throws me under the bus – saying because I’m spiritual/pagan but a decent part of my family is strong Christian/born again Christian that I’m toning back the ceremony.
He says it’s just “a pathetic way to amuse other people.”
I’ve toned down the ceremony because I’m not overtly religious, and let’s face it – I know a huge Wiccan/Pagan ceremony by FH would not only make me feel uncomfortable but would flip out my entire family.
I’m hurt more he threw me under the bus without talkig ot me first. I had draft up a basic outline for ceremony idea I liked, asked him to read it over on his own time, and after a week or two – asked him what he thought. We sat down to discuss it and he said “I really like it”
Only – once our friend/officient gets involved to say that he hate it and our entire wedding is a cope out.
Then when I ask why, he plays passive aggressive and says it doesn’t matter.
Given how he spoke about the ceremony – and we’re less than 2 months out – I don’t know what to do. I have only a week or two to make decisions, but I DO NOT want to feel I’m dragging him through a wedding ceremony that he considers pathetic and a cop out.
I feel the ceremony I wrote has a lot of meaning to us, keeping it meaningful without throwing our different religious views in older family member’s faces.
He refuses to write down what he wants for a ceremony, he refuses to offer ideas. I can’t get him to offer any input other than criticism.
What should I do? It seems the most important part of the day is now falling apart.