Post # 1
I’ve read posts about it being bad ettiquette to invite people to the bachelor party but not the wedding, but I’ve never heard of guests choosing to go to a bachelor party but not the wedding itself. I get that people have things going on in their lives, but in this case it’s work-related and I can’t help but think give me a break! Can’t you prepare for your big presentation ahead of time? How about the 4 days you’re spending in Vegas instead of coming to New York for 2?
It’s my fiance’s friend, so I’m just sad for him and also feeling kind of disrespected myself. Is that weird? Is there some sort of ettiquette on this that it’s ok, and I’m just out of the loop?
Post # 3
Guys probably don’t enjoy weddings as much as they do 4 days in Vegas – plus if he has to choose one or the other, Vegas/Bach trip will definitely give him more face time with your Fiance, a whole weekend of fun together instead of just ten minutes at the wedding.
It’s tough that he can’t make both, but he probably has good reasons/intentions behind the decision he’s made!
Post # 4
I think its great that his is making an effort to even make it to the bach party.. Sure a little dissapointing for his friend not to be making it for the big day, but at least hes making an effort. he couldve not come to the bach party and your FH would have been more devo!
Post # 5
Guys don’t think like us. To them, they’re both a party. He just chose to the Vegas party instead of the NY party.
Try not to be offended. I don’t think he’s meaning to be offensive.
Post # 6
If your fiancee is not offended, I wouldnt be for him. Work can take precedence over other things and his friend might not have the money or time to go to both Vegas and NY which depending on where you live, can be super far to either place. Ive had a lot of guy friends get married that have friends go with them to the bachelor party that cant make it to the wedding.
Post # 7
I’ve actually done this to a friend. I really couldn’t go to the wedding, so I made an extra effort (few across the country to surprise her) to go to her bachelorette party in order to be able to participate in some of the festivities and show that she was important to me. If your FI’s friend can’t come to the wedding, then he can’t, and whether or not he can go to the bachelor party won’t change that. I think it’s great that he will be able to go to the bachelor party to get to spend time with your Fiance.
Post # 8
I say the same. I think it’s nice that he’s making the effort to attend the event that he’s able to.
Money-wise as well, for me it would cost almost 2000 to get to new York for two days, but only about 500 to get to Vegas. This could be a factor depending where he lives as well.
Post # 9
Thanks for all of your posts! Those are some good points. The cost issue would be in favor of the wedding (he can drive, versus a flight and other activity expenses for the bach party). But guys really do think about these sorts of things differently (or not at all 😉 As long as my FH is happy, I’m happy. You guys are the best!