(Closed) Mother question his abality to provide for me..

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That must be super frustrating.  FI parents are like that sometimes.  It can be really irritating when you are trying to vent about being frustrated and mom or dad takes it as its ok to start bashing on your SO.  

Post # 4
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

your mom said –  “you sure he can take care of you? You sure he can provide you, like we do…”

That sounds old-fashioned… ignore the comment! In the days of your mom, it’s common to make sure the husband brings home the bacon and the mom stays home with the kids…

Post # 5
Member
8362 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I don’t know is it wrong for a mother to worry about her child?

Post # 6
Member
3303 posts
Sugar bee

I would refrain from discussing money with your mother any more

Post # 7
Member
3081 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@armychica06: Right. It sort of sounds like she’s using what your’e just thinking of as a vent to twist it around to imply the Fiance won’t be able to provide for you. Which, I’m not sure of your relationship and outlook with him, but I look at it as we provide for each other and the future. 

Regardless, not giving your mom ammunition should be helpful in the future. 

Post # 9
Member
1352 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@cassandra102012:  I wouldn’t take it too personally, parents just want the best for their kids and they dont want to see them hurting or struggling, I think it came from a good place but it just came across wrong. If you say he is a hardworker then I don’t think you have anything to worry about 🙂 it’s when they are missing that drive that you have to worry.

Post # 10
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I think it’s natural to worry about money, even though she probably didn’t word it the right way in that he should be “providing” for you. Money problems can wreck a marriage like no other. Often times parents can interpret “We’re tight on money and live paycheck to paycheck” as “The person I’m marrying doesn’t know how to manage their finances.”

Don’t worry about it. You know your Fiance is a hard worker. My husband works his ass off, but the first 3 years were a really horrible struggle for us because he couldn’t find a decent job. It’s tough out there.

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