(Closed) FI completely careless…what if something happened? VENT

posted 8 years ago in Home
Post # 17
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@mcklough: Do you live in a really good neighborhood, or are you being sarcastic?

Post # 18
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

we live in the country in a lake front community. There is some crime out here, but I guess I figure if someone really wants to break in the lock on my front door isn’t going to stop them.

SO and I joke about who should sleep closest to the door if a bear ever breaks in but that is as far as our concern about break ins goes

Post # 19
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

This is pretty serious, I kind of disagree with pp who say to cut him a break. My fi grew up in an area where the doors were unlocked, they just were and that was that. I really had to lose my everloving mind one reallll good time and it stopped.

Post # 20
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I’ve done this 2-3 times at least, and it freaked me out that I had done this, I am generally a careful person. Before this house, I’ve never had a garage to park in, so it’s a new thing for me. Also, if I don’t hit the button on the garage remote just right then the door does not close. Now I make a habit of pausing at the end of the driveway and looking back to make sure the door is closed.

I was fully ashamed that I had left the door open and actually quite thankful that my hubby did not freak out at me. Yes it is a big thing, and he knows that it shouldn’t be left open, but having someone on your case is only likely to make a person defensive.  If I’ve learned anything about marriage so far it’s that sometimes you have to give your partner the benefit of the doubt. We all make mistakes. 

Post # 21
47187 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Why not just get a timer for the door so it automatically closes after a certain period of time?

Seems like an easy solution to me.

Post # 22
630 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Put a Post-it that says “CLOSE THE GARAGE DOOR” on his steering wheel every night before you go to bed so he sees it in the morning. That’s how I taught my Fiance to do things. 🙂

Post # 24
2561 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

My Darling Husband has accidently left the front door unlocked, though it is probably because we almost always use the attached garage to come and go. It has only happened like 1-2 times in the 2 1/2 years we have lived here though. We are both really careful to watch the garage door close and make sure it doesn’t freeze or bounce up or something.

Post # 25
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I don’t think it’s good to stage a fake break-in, but I do think it’s a good idea to find out what the actual danger is in your own home town.  if break-ins happen there, then he does need to hear about it.

I used to be really stubborn about walking alone at night. my SO and all my friends told me not to, and I was dead set against it. I felt like I was being safe enough, I love walking, and I HATE calling/waiting for cabs. but then I started to follow a blog about my neighborhood, and learned about all the muggings that happen on my block. let’s just say, I don’t walk alone at night anymore! I was scared straight by the actual facts of my neighborhood.   

Post # 27
2583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I don’t see the point or benefit in an angry reaction to something that a) was not done on purpose and b) already happened, and everything was alright.  Scare tactics and yelling aren’t really conducive to changing people’s habits (if my Mr. told me a bunch of horror stories – the result would be me rolling my eyes a lot, and if he staged a break in, the result would be me breaking up with him, because thats INSANE). 

Find a memory-triggering strategy that works for him – such as a sign on a door or in the car, an alarm on his phone, or a sticky note on the fridge or bathroom mirror.  Positive reinforcement works a whole lot better than negative.

Post # 29
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Call your local police department and ask if a crime prevention officer can come do a home security survey. S/he will be able to tell you about crime in the area and how to better protect yourself and your home. Hopefully they will be able to impress upon your Fiance how important these security measures are. Also ask them how your local police feel about coming out to search the house the next time he forgets to close the door. You should not have had to search the house alone. 


Post # 31
1012 posts
Bumble bee

Sorry i have no coment.  I live in Canada and we leave our houses unlocked.  SO leaves for work every morning and the house is unlocked.  We leave and walk the dog and the house is unlocked.   

It was an accident you can only mention it to him and hope that he will try to remember.

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